kittycatxo

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kittycatxo

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 15351
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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kittycatxo's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 4:41pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 7:55pm<b>Denny1</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 11:17pm<b>tacojauns</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 12:35pm<b>slackerjoe</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 11:14am<b>theworldisflat</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 10:57pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 11:41pm<b>damwoods</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 6:26pm<b>Gunguy</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 1:53am<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 10:47pm<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 10:07pm<b>Tate_43</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 6:49pm<b>bkarp911</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 9:59am<b>Miss_Klutzie</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 5:34pm<b>macorncob</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 8:37am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 5:51am<b>Faith13</b> - the 05/25/2013 at 4:06am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 05/22/2013 at 2:47pm

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kittycatxo's favorite FMLs

Today, my purse was stolen from my bag while I was on the train. The thief will be surprised to find that it wasn't my money purse, but in fact my "period purse". Hope they find tampons useful. FML

by haveahappyperiod / 10/04/2013 at 5:39am / Miscellaneous

Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML

by f.a.t. / 10/04/2013 at 4:20am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to dinner with a guy I like and paid the $120 bill. After joking that he was an expensive date, he replied, "I laugh at how you think this is a date." FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2013 at 4:14am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, while working at Subway, I was about to take a guy's order. He quickly held up a hand and asked for someone else to make his sub, because he doesn't like "ugly people" touching his food. FML

by /(•'_'•)\ / 09/07/2013 at 12:59pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, my best friend confessed to me that she's a lesbian. She quickly added, "Oh, don't worry, I don't like you. You're not attractive." FML

by ...thanks / 09/07/2013 at 10:17am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

by Anonymous / 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at Walmart, a woman kept screaming at her husband for the most ridiculous reasons. My friend snickered that she must be on her period, prompting her to whirl around, storm over, and slap the hell out of me, thinking I was the one who said it. FML

by what's a rimjob between friends? / 09/06/2013 at 5:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, at a job interview, I was asked what I thought of twerking. It was a bizarre question, but trying to get on the interviewer's good side, I said I thought it was pretty cool. He snorted and said I'll be job-seeking for a while yet. FML

by howprofessional / 09/06/2013 at 5:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

by aherdofpigs / 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was grounded by my dad for "popping pills like a gangbanger". I take prescription ADHD medicine and a multi-vitamin. FML

by zephyrgk / 09/01/2013 at 9:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, while on vacation, I called my home phone to check the messages. Someone answered. FML

by Anonymous / 09/01/2013 at 7:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend tried to get me to wear curly wig, so I could pretend to be Harry Styles in bed. FML

by Anonymous / 09/01/2013 at 12:34pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

by NotGabe / 09/01/2013 at 10:25am / United States (Texas) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my friend told me she turned down a job as a babysitter because she didn't want to be secretly videotaped, as she knew the people had a nanny cam. I wasn't aware of this when I took that same job a few nights ago and asked my boyfriend to come by. We had sex on their couch. FML

by happyturtle / 09/01/2013 at 5:57am / Croatia / Intimacy