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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I got my eyebrows waxed. The lady who waxed my eyebrows also decided to pop the big zit on my forehead. She charged me a dollar extra. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25543) - you deserved it (4954)
On 08/09/2011 at 1:35pm - misc - by pizzaface - United States
Today, my husband declined a $100k/year job due to him thinking that a full time job at one work place would be too 'depressing'. I'm a nurse and have to wipe other people's arses for a living, then come home to this lazy dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36414) - you deserved it (5968)
On 08/09/2011 at 9:48am - work - by Lauren - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28543) - you deserved it (8924)
On 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, even though I made the point of tanning naked, I still got tan lines thanks to my fat rolls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11573) - you deserved it (36132)
On 08/05/2011 at 3:06pm - health - by Username - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I snuck into the bathroom together at his house for a quickie. Just as we unzipped our pants, his step-dad knocked on the door. Panicking, I jumped into the closet to hide. When his step-dad came in, he went to put some towels away. In the closet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11356) - you deserved it (32827)
On 08/03/2011 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I got an anonymous letter, stating my condo's community and all my neighbors can hear me having sex. Not only that, but kids gather around my window to listen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12543) - you deserved it (22881)
On 08/03/2011 at 10:33am - intimacy - by Username - United States
Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45774) - you deserved it (2382)
On 08/03/2011 at 12:04am - misc - by soccerbuddyz - United States (Florida)
Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant, but I was so embarrassed to be mistaken for a pregnant lady that I rubbed my tummy and said "December." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27814) - you deserved it (12494)
On 07/31/2011 at 9:16pm - health - by preggo (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I was in a restroom sitting on the toilet, when the guy right next to me noticed my AC/DC boxers around my ankles and started to sing "Back in Black." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20011) - you deserved it (1310)
On 07/29/2011 at 10:27am - misc - by sofargone420 (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, yep, pubic hair is still flammable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9859) - you deserved it (41668)
On 07/25/2011 at 11:12am - health - by Smokey9 - United States (Florida)
Today, I learned that I'm allergic to hornets. I also learned that when your mom sprays a hornets' nest, and they come after you, that jumping in the pool doesn't help. They hover and wait for you to surface. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30674) - you deserved it (2311)
On 07/25/2011 at 12:14am - health - by sisi9999 (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I sneezed so violently that my tampon came out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53059) - you deserved it (5468)
On 07/23/2011 at 9:06am - intimacy - by Sarah - United States
Today, after babysitting, the parents actually tried to pay me in Trident Layers Gum. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37757) - you deserved it (3553)
On 07/21/2011 at 8:20pm - money - by iwantmoney - United States (Ohio)
Today, I killed a centipede. Now every little itch I feel, I think it's the centipede's spirit coming back to haunt me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12159) - you deserved it (31198)
On 07/20/2011 at 8:36am - misc - by ElixirRose - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went over to my girlfriend's house to meet her entire family for the first time. Trying not to be rude, I ate their 12-bean and chorizo soup. Now I'm stuck in the bathroom trying to unclog the toilet with no plunger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31593) - you deserved it (3559)
On 07/19/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by PissNTra - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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