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kingbling11

Offline (the 08/21/2014 at 2:43am) | Search for a member

kingbling11

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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 381
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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kingbling11's page activity

Visits<b>Baustigt</b> - the 09/15/2012 at 11:08pm

kingbling11's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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kingbling11's favorite FMLs

Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML

#20071617
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23493) - you deserved it (1932)

On 09/14/2012 at 12:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

#20071482
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15308) - you deserved it (25426)

On 09/14/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had breakfast with his grandmother. She told him how I'm prettier than "that Mexican" he'd brought home for dinner last week. We had dinner with her last week, and I'm that same Mexican. She then went on to how Mexicans are what's wrong with the economy. FML

#20071462
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25847) - you deserved it (2647)

On 09/14/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by MexicanMe (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML

#19903031
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62407) - you deserved it (5030)

On 07/07/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Dammit - United States (California)

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML

#19873048
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36438) - you deserved it (1675)

On 06/30/2012 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I found out that my little brother has been rubbing my toothbrush in dog shit for the last month because I accidentally broke one of his toys. FML

#19664729
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25037) - you deserved it (4074)

On 05/22/2012 at 9:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled "geronimo" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML

#19615713
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28403) - you deserved it (2747)

On 05/13/2012 at 8:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I accidentally adopted a dolphin for $125. FML

#19566058
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10907) - you deserved it (27043)

On 05/02/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Optimus_Prime97 - United States

Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML

#19509709
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26526) - you deserved it (10996)

On 04/22/2012 at 3:01am - misc - by ultraattitude - United States (California)

Today, my misanthropic malcontent of a son smashed my air freshener and turned my faulty lava lamp on in a twisted act of rebellion. The bottom of the lamp broke and got wax everywhere. My room now smells like cinnamon, with a hint of freshly embalmed corpse. FML

#19066178
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20604) - you deserved it (4150)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:31pm - kids - by Username - India

Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML

#18716043
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33130) - you deserved it (9174)

On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

#18385235
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42572) - you deserved it (4944)

On 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was lying on the floor playing with my cat. I was holding her in the air, when my sister tripped over the TV cord and unplugged the cable. The TV made a loud fuzzy sound, I got scared and threw my cat in the air. I got scratched in the face by a falling cat. FML

#18384593
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14952) - you deserved it (22994)

On 11/29/2011 at 11:15am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mother spent over $5,000 to fly in a Feng-Shui master, put him in a five-star hotel, and had him walk around our house with a compass, moving things to help improve the "energy flow." Now all I have in my room is an old mattress and lamp. He's coming back tomorrow. FML

#18209020
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31594) - you deserved it (2854)

On 11/10/2011 at 9:35am - money - by Agathus (man) - United Arab Emirates

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

#17985302
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30475) - you deserved it (5182) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by adieuvelib - France



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