kimilei

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kimilei

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 932
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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kimilei's page activity

Visits<b>Jarod_Yeager</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 11:01am<b>aa1717</b> - the 03/03/2013 at 4:14pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 9:23am<b>thesunshotme</b> - the 12/23/2009 at 10:13pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/29/2009 at 11:17pm<b>moonlight_daze</b> - the 09/22/2009 at 1:50am

kimilei's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

kimilei's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend called me freaking out because of an online pregnancy test. She was scared because she had no idea that she was pregnant, let alone having a fifteen pound baby. The website is a joke. She goes to an Ivy League school, and I couldn't even get into community college. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2009 at 12:21am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that "Je suis excité" does not mean "I'm excited" in French. It means "I'm sexually excited"... more or less. I've been doing a lot of exciting things and using it a lot the past two weeks. With my French friends, people I meet, and especially with my host family. FML

by Anonymous / 09/21/2009 at 10:26am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Intimacy

Today, I got a client who ordered ice cream. She seemed really nice and I thought maybe she was into me. When I asked if she wanted peanuts for an additional 50 cents, she said no. Trying to be nice, I added them anyway free of charge. I later had to call the ambulance. She was allergic. FML

by FreeOfCharge / 09/21/2009 at 2:06am / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I had misplaced my cell phone. I decided the best course of action would be to dial the number from my house phone and wait for it to ring to locate it. Somebody answered when I called. It wasn't the wrong number and I had a brief conversation with the man that stole my phone. FML

by callerid / 08/03/2009 at 7:45am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I called my boyfriend and when he answered, I said the dirtiest thing I could think of to him on the phone. After a long silence, I heard, "Lacey? Is that you?" I accidentally called my dad. FML

by crazyt446 / 07/11/2009 at 11:13am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up from a nap to hear my roommate having some intimate time with his hand. The slopping and slurping sounds along with the girly man squeal as he finished haunted me all day. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2009 at 5:59pm / Iraq (Arbil) / Intimacy

Today, they finally took my braces off. 7 hours later I fell off my bike and chipped my tooth. FML

by Noname / 10/29/2008 at 6:09am / Slovenia (Bohinj) / Health

Today, I kissed the girl I love for the first time. Her reaction? She vomited. FML

by alf / 10/26/2008 at 10:34pm / Love

Today, I went to see a movie with the girl I've liked for months. After the commercials, she told me she had to go to the ladies room. She never came back. FML

by Lo / 10/25/2008 at 12:56pm / Love

Today, I was writing to my girlfriend on msn when her roommate answered «Sorry, this is not Marie, she is at her boyfriend’s». Really? I've looked everywhere in my flat, I can’t find her. FML

by Icy / 10/25/2008 at 12:56pm / Love

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

by mehdi / 10/13/2008 at 4:20am / Miscellaneous