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killer1525

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killer1525

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 861
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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killer1525's page activity

Visits<b>effyolife23</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 1:09am

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killer1525's favorite FMLs

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63712) - you deserved it (8101)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after getting home from the supermarket, I went to unlock the door so my dad could carry the groceries in. No matter how hard or how many different ways I tried, the lock wouldn't shift. My dad eventually grabbed the keys, twisted once, and after the door unlocked, called me an idiot. FML

#21132298
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31350) - you deserved it (9440)

On 05/06/2014 at 11:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I met up with my group for class. We were doing some final checks on the project we've been working on all semester, when I realized something about one guy's work seemed off. I googled it and found out it's almost completely plagiarized. It's all due in the morning. FML

#21130579
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41037) - you deserved it (3714)

On 05/04/2014 at 2:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, at a big Easter egg hunt, the kids found a wild bunny. Everyone smiled and "aww"ed, until my dog caught and ate it in front everyone. FML

#21118358
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43212) - you deserved it (5021)

On 04/20/2014 at 7:24pm - animals - by BetterThanChocolate (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my crazily elitist parents were so desperate to get me to dump my fiancé that they threatened to divorce if I didn't. When I told them to go ahead, they bitched me out for being disrespectful. FML

#21117173
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43586) - you deserved it (3747)

On 04/19/2014 at 1:25pm - love - by reb (woman) - United Kingdom (Ealing)

Today, I was babysitting a 9-year-old kid, when she got thirsty and asked for a drink. All I could find was some kind of Mexican fruit drink, but I didn't realize until too late that it was actually hard liquor. I had to scrub her mouth out with toothpaste and put her to bed to cover it all up. FML

#21116530
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25393) - you deserved it (43058)

On 04/18/2014 at 5:31pm - kids - by cantprovenothing (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend's little brother challenged me to a water gun fight. I accepted, not knowing he was going to fill his gun with vinegar, then shoot me in the eyes with it. FML

#21111233
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41355) - you deserved it (4227)

On 04/12/2014 at 3:59pm - kids - by BeatByA9yrold (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to show a new student around my school. Normally, that wouldn't be such a bad thing, but the student was my crazy, overly-attached ex. I transferred schools to get away from her in the first place. FML

#21108356
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42956) - you deserved it (3246)

On 04/09/2014 at 8:37am - misc - by not_this_shit_again (man) - Singapore

Today, I thought it would be funny to smack my daughter's head gently with a balloon. It hit her hair clip and exploded. She won't stop crying, and my wife will be home any minute. I'm screwed. FML

#21100295
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41274) - you deserved it (17887)

On 03/30/2014 at 4:36pm - kids - by and not even in the good way (man) - United States

Today, my neighbor called the police for the seventh time because he's convinced I'm a vampire. He's also gotten in the habit of leaving garlic cloves in my yard. My parents come next week. FML

#21095586
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37184) - you deserved it (2849)

On 03/24/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by Vampprobs - United States (Michigan)

Today, my mom and I flew three hours from Wyoming to a volleyball camp in Kentucky. When we arrived, we went to the volleyball center and told them I was there for the volleyball camp. They told me it had been cancelled two weeks ago and they forgot to call us. FML

#21066263
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49168) - you deserved it (3550)

On 02/20/2014 at 3:57am - health - by maddengirl12 (woman) - United States

Today, I ran out of toilet paper. I yelled from the bathroom for my parents to bring me some toilet paper. My dad slipped one tiny piece of toilet paper under the door and boomed, "THE FINAL TEST." FML

#21058095
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38955) - you deserved it (5164)

On 02/12/2014 at 12:57pm - misc - by airhead2015 (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my daughter hugged me around the neck and whispered, "I'm going to cut your head off." I'm afraid to go to sleep now. FML

#21043189
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43202) - you deserved it (5295)

On 01/28/2014 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Bahrain (Al Manamah)

Today, after three weeks of fighting with my husband, I found out that he really didn't create an account on a website for cheaters and charge the bill to his credit card. Our daughter did it as a prank, and only confessed because our fighting was stressing her out. FML

#21031747
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48505) - you deserved it (5762)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my 7-year-old daughter made a new game: hitting me in the groin when I'm not expecting it. She hunts me in the house, hides around corners, and behind furniture to ambush me. She'll even do it if she catches me napping. I'm a grown man living in fear of a little girl. FML

#21029770
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51625) - you deserved it (11563)

On 01/16/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)



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