Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

khaayotic

Offline (one hour ago) | Search for a member

khaayotic

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 December 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3045
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About khaayotic : My name is Kayla, and I cry over anime boys.

khaayotic's page activity

Visits<b>PrinPrinLife</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 11:07am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 1:48pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 9:59pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 11:10pm<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 8:48pm<b>aleximo</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:00pm<b>domolovesyoshi</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 3:29am<b>Tankkiller308</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 12:09pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 4:30pm<b>thethirdthea</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 9:45pm<b>nonsensical600</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 8:26pm<b>olpally</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 7:05pm<b>EmberFury</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 9:51pm<b>oomph</b> - the 11/08/2012 at 5:41am<b>Svensen</b> - the 10/26/2012 at 9:09am<b>Friaza</b> - the 09/22/2012 at 7:07pm<b>isengaged</b> - the 04/16/2012 at 3:19pm

khaayotic's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of khaayotic's badges

khaayotic's favorite FMLs

Today, I received the first compliment from the opposite sex that I've gotten in months, from an elderly, cross-dressing man in the parking lot of Goodwill. Apparently my clothes look like they'd be "exciting to try on." FML

#19129849
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19809) - you deserved it (2597)

On 02/21/2012 at 7:44am - misc - by mishie1 (woman) - United States

Today, I set my alarm half-an-hour earlier so I could masturbate. That's how horny and single I am. FML

#19129332
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22508) - you deserved it (26199)

On 02/21/2012 at 3:10am - intimacy - by desperate905 - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I couldn’t have a conversation with my fiancé unless it was about Dragon Ball Z. FML

#19122021
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22733) - you deserved it (7057)

On 02/20/2012 at 10:53am - love - by DBZ (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went out on a first date. He insisted we go to McDonald's and split a Happy Meal because he "didn't want to waste any money on a first date." FML

#19098700
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33133) - you deserved it (4246)

On 02/17/2012 at 4:44am - love - by Cheap N Happy (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that I probably have anger issues. I came to this conclusion after I finished screaming abuse at the microwave for beeping before I could hit the off switch. FML

#19058382
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8704) - you deserved it (26048)

On 02/12/2012 at 4:50pm - misc - by fuck teh poleese (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He swore it wouldn't be 2 minutes long this time. He was right. It was 3 minutes. FML

#19045630
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30978) - you deserved it (5165)

On 02/11/2012 at 12:57am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my mother used global warming as an excuse for not remembering my birthday. FML

#19042129
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29946) - you deserved it (2362)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - Belgium (Brabant Wallon)

Today, my social anxiety got so bad, I nearly had a panic attack when too many people joined my World of Warcraft party. FML

#19033739
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24684) - you deserved it (15762)

On 02/09/2012 at 11:42am - health - by SocialAnxietyNightmare (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML

#19011478
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37221) - you deserved it (4299)

On 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm - animals - by BoringFucker (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I was having lunch at McDonald's when I dropped a French fry down my shirt. It stuck out the top of my bra. Before I had the chance to remove it, a creepy man picked it out and ate it saying that it was the best French fry he had ever eaten. FML

#19000148
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45200) - you deserved it (4666)

On 02/05/2012 at 10:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I realised my girlfriend only has sex with me to make me exercise. FML

#18990200
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16254) - you deserved it (32555)

On 02/04/2012 at 5:16am - intimacy - by mattttbob - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML

#18936421
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33695) - you deserved it (3045)

On 01/28/2012 at 7:10pm - love - by Shelly P. (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML

#18936421
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33695) - you deserved it (3045)

On 01/28/2012 at 7:10pm - love - by Shelly P. (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was talking dirty with someone on the phone, when at one point I said, "Oh yeah, you like that?" She responded, "I can't actually feel anything you know, we're just on the phone." FML

#18904031
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12037) - you deserved it (32671)

On 01/25/2012 at 12:00am - intimacy - by talkingtoaretard (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out if I refuse my boyfriend anything in public, he will continually yell out, "Penis!" until he gets his way. FML

#18837069
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25661) - you deserved it (7955)

On 01/17/2012 at 6:41pm - misc - by anon. (woman) - United States



Juliette Bubulle's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Juliette's illustrated FML
  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: