khaayotic

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khaayotic

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 2 December 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4650
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About khaayotic : My name is Kayla, and I cry over anime boys.

khaayotic's page activity

Visits<b>shockhead101</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 9:24pm<b>Adamjohn82</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 3:53pm<b>minimanion</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 8:57am<b>frankmz</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 10:55pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 12:47pm<b>Scootythedog</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 7:34pm<b>de384484</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 11:46am<b>igg125</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 9:57pm<b>RA91</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 2:28am<b>marshm610</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 10:49pm<b>krazyelliot</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 9:18am<b>Salvanoi</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 2:59am<b>TimTheLeg</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 4:01pm<b>thatoneguy1111</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:08am<b>mrlawlor7777</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 3:13am<b>moron011</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 7:41am<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 1:41am<b>PrinPrinLife</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 11:07am

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 7:22am<b>de384484</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 5:46pm<b>minimanion</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 3:30am<b>marshm610</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 4:49am<b>RA91</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 4:13am<b>shockhead101</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 3:45am

khaayotic's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of khaayotic's badges

khaayotic's favorite FMLs

Today, I was debating which hurts more: child-birth or a kick to the testicles. Some guy spouted the old urban legend that a nut-kick is 9000 "dels", and giving birth is 57, so I proved that no such measurement of pain exists. His comeback was to sucker-punch me to the floor. FML

by go snope yourself / 01/26/2013 at 4:51pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

by WTF / 01/16/2013 at 2:52am / Miscellaneous

Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2012 at 8:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2012 at 7:06pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was chatting to a friend on Facebook about girls, and why we're single. We somehow ended up admitting to one another that we'd never get girlfriends, finding out that we both like hentai porn, and trading info on Japanese sex toys. FML

by XxtentaculonxX / 12/08/2012 at 5:52pm / United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute) / Love

Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML

by Emily / 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

by FlyingFist / 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I put on a shirt that said "skilled in every position." My boyfriend took one look and said, "since when?" FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2012 at 12:05am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML

by thanks, fuckface / 11/16/2012 at 2:42pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend snapped at me for being lazy and incompetent, and declared that if I was going to behave like a child, she would be treating me like one. This includes safety-proofing the house, talking to me like a 3-year-old and slapping me with a wooden spoon when I do something wrong. FML

by Z / 11/13/2012 at 7:43pm / Australia / Love

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

by anon / 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend showed me a video of me in a nightclub. I was holding two Skittles vodka shots and shouting, "Red and green, merry Kwanzaa!" The shots were yellow and purple. I can't remember that night at all. FML

Today, dressed in my sexiest nightie, I asked my boyfriend in the most sensual voice possible what he'd like me do to for him tonight. His eyed widened, he started clapping wildly and then shrieked, "SPAGHETTI CARBONARA!" FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2012 at 7:48am / France (Picardie) / Love

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying that I couldn't wait for him to get home and see my costume, and that I had dressed up as a naked lady. He texted back asking if I could dress up as someone who was making dinner instead. FML

by okay._. / 11/01/2012 at 3:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy