About khaayotic : My name is Kayla, and I cry over anime boys.
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khaayotic's favorite FMLs
by ihatejasonderulo / 09/02/2014 at 11:32am / United Kingdom (Hounslow) / Intimacy
Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML
by Anonymous / 08/25/2014 at 1:44am / United States (Ohio) / Geek
by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/09/2014 at 9:31am / United States (Ohio) / Kids
Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML
by happypineapple / 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm / Australia (Queensland) / Animals
by massachusettsan / 06/24/2014 at 8:07pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by stopinthenameoflove / 06/19/2014 at 10:37am / Ireland (Dublin) / Love
by ashamed father / 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML
by not getting laid / 10/13/2013 at 10:38am / United States (Texas) / Love
by EconM / 10/03/2013 at 11:38am / United States / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend walked in on me taking a dump, and started plucking her eyebrows. When I told her I was uncomfortable, she said, "Aww, is my baby's poo shy? Is it, is it?" and pinched my cheek. FML
by noweddingforyou / 09/29/2013 at 3:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by disappointed / 09/20/2013 at 12:30pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
by Kit / 09/16/2013 at 7:09am / United Kingdom (Swindon) / Love
Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML
by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck / 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm / Guam / Miscellaneous
Today, I was delivering pizza. When I went up to the front door, an elderly lady answered. She was wearing a floral dress that went down to her shins and had a Nicolas Cage mask on with eye holes cut out. When I glanced behind her, I saw her cats had them too. FML
by nicholascageonyourface / 06/09/2013 at 1:13am / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous