Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

khaayotic

Search for a member

khaayotic
  • Town/Country : Toronto, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 December 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 1454
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About khaayotic : My name is Kayla, and I cry over anime boys.

khaayotic's last visitors

WelshitethethirdtheaolpallyEmberFuryoomphFriaza

khaayotic's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

See all of khaayotic's badges

khaayotic's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend said he wanted to try something new. By something new, it was to put flour in my butt and see what would happen if I farted. FML

#15281187
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41608) - you deserved it (7285)

On 03/12/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, it's official, we measured. My boyfriend's manboobs are bigger than my breasts. FML

#15225525
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42848) - you deserved it (8213)

On 03/07/2011 at 1:16am - health - by tinygirl -

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44125) - you deserved it (8911)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was walking in the park with my boyfriend of 3 years. He stopped and knelt down in front of me. I started to panic, then he told me to calm down, my shoe was untied. FML

#14908871
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28035) - you deserved it (11468)

On 02/09/2011 at 12:48pm - misc - by maddie! - United States (New York)

Today, I cried harder than I have in years. I was babysitting, and watching Pokémon to pass the time. It was the episode where Ash, Dawn, and Brock on the show went their separate ways, and may never be together again. FML

#14852501
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13233) - you deserved it (30067)

On 02/05/2011 at 12:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my cat died while walking around the kitchen. He had a heart attack when the toaster popped out two slices of bread. FML

#14753781
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46229) - you deserved it (3809) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2011 at 3:09am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML

#14671725
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48418) - you deserved it (4454)

On 01/22/2011 at 8:00am - intimacy - by fmlalways - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14479) - you deserved it (38240) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38061) - you deserved it (25746) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I realized that I'll have to explain to my child that mommy and daddy met on World of Warcraft. FML

#14376347
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14049) - you deserved it (47173)

On 12/29/2010 at 12:20am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, an attractive guy told me he wanted to get to know me and see me again. When I told my boyfriend, in hopes of stirring up some jealousy, he said "he'll regret it when he finds out what you're like in bed, trust me." FML

#14282148
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19138) - you deserved it (36024)

On 12/21/2010 at 4:38am - intimacy - by fail (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML

#14248345
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28549) - you deserved it (3349)

On 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by asdfghjkl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

#14244389
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31988) - you deserved it (3805)

On 12/18/2010 at 4:11am - love - by anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I found out that the woman I'm currently dating used to be a man. FML

#14105227
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52303) - you deserved it (8843)

On 12/06/2010 at 7:24am - intimacy - by swindstorm -

Today, my girlfriend threw my X-box out the window, because I asked her how much she weighs. FML

#14023923
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22421) - you deserved it (48712)

On 11/29/2010 at 2:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: