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khaayotic

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khaayotic

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 December 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3036
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About khaayotic : My name is Kayla, and I cry over anime boys.

khaayotic's page activity

Visits<b>PrinPrinLife</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 11:07am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 1:48pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 9:59pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 11:10pm<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 8:48pm<b>aleximo</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:00pm<b>domolovesyoshi</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 3:29am<b>Tankkiller308</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 12:09pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 4:30pm<b>thethirdthea</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 9:45pm<b>nonsensical600</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 8:26pm<b>olpally</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 7:05pm<b>EmberFury</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 9:51pm<b>oomph</b> - the 11/08/2012 at 5:41am<b>Svensen</b> - the 10/26/2012 at 9:09am<b>Friaza</b> - the 09/22/2012 at 7:07pm<b>isengaged</b> - the 04/16/2012 at 3:19pm

khaayotic's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of khaayotic's badges

khaayotic's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

#21296872
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47752) - you deserved it (4898)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

#21293465
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33606) - you deserved it (6473)

On 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm - love - by notsofriendly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was being interviewed for a grant over the phone. When asked why I wanted to go to school to be an OB nursing assistant, I panicked and yelled, "BECAUSE VAGINAS ARE FASCINATING!" into the receiver. FML

#21286497
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27814) - you deserved it (11623)

On 10/27/2014 at 7:05pm - health - by lady parts - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

#21271608
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40423) - you deserved it (18329)

On 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML

#21250887
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45445) - you deserved it (5928)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by very punny (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML

#21250455
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36260) - you deserved it (9054)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:32am - intimacy - by ihatejasonderulo - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML

#21244858
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44986) - you deserved it (8017)

On 08/25/2014 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43474) - you deserved it (27763)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

#21233179
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42337) - you deserved it (6153)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML

#21211381
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36335) - you deserved it (17633)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm - misc - by happypineapple - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got the same feeling in my chest when I orgasmed as when I hit a hard section in Guitar Hero. FML

#21187067
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37096) - you deserved it (7485)

On 06/24/2014 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by massachusettsan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50653) - you deserved it (14267)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

#21082455
403 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41358) - you deserved it (7787)

On 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm - kids - by ashamed father (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

#20918730
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21707) - you deserved it (81880)

On 10/13/2013 at 10:38am - love - by not getting laid - United States (Texas)



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