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kgray99

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kgray99

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  • Number of visits : 530
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kgray99's page activity

Visits<b>JesusFreak227</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 5:28pm<b>pink_raindrops</b> - the 03/16/2011 at 5:07pm

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50 favourites

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It’s in the can

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kgray99's favorite FMLs

Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML

#8265301
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19277) - you deserved it (4856)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by klsdhjla (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML

#7501218
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39837) - you deserved it (3388)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by Funnymann - United States

Today, I was watching Star Wars : Attack of the Clones, and Yoda was using the force to move a heavy object. While in the middle of my loungeroom, I instinctively put my hand up to use the force to help him, infront of my father and sister. My sister will never let me live it down. FML

#7212401
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6848) - you deserved it (34569)

On 01/08/2010 at 2:56am - misc - by Fuzzy (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up from a nap and thought I felt somebody's arm in my bed. I frantically start hitting it and start screaming. I soon realized it was my own arm. I had fallen asleep on it, and it was completely numb, I couldn't feel a thing. FML

#7004520
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19250) - you deserved it (10323)

On 12/29/2009 at 12:11am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend told me he likes having sex during my period because it makes him feel like he stabbed a small animal to death. FML

#6968124
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38660) - you deserved it (4119)

On 12/27/2009 at 2:13am - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States

Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML

#6302850
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6937) - you deserved it (66951)

On 11/14/2009 at 4:37pm - animals - by TheMichaelNixon - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the fire alarm went off in my dorm and I saw and smelled smoke coming under my door. My second story window wouldn't unlock so I broke it open, threw out as many of my belongings as I could, and jumped. Turns out, the smell and noise were from my roomates cheap vacuum cleaner, not a fire. FML

Today, I was driving through a neighborhood and saw a "slow down, children" sign. I was nice and slowed down as I passed a couple little kids with their parents outside watching them. I guess I was going too slow because one of the fathers started chasing me down the street calling me a pedophile. FML

#5340344
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40271) - you deserved it (3811)

On 09/18/2009 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was driving into a parking lot with some friends. I carelessly passed a sign when my friend said, "Wait what did that sign say?" I backed up to read it and guess what it said: "Severe Tire Damage. Do Not Back Up." Now all 4 of my tires are slashed. FML

#5006277
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15291) - you deserved it (38183)

On 09/02/2009 at 8:18pm - misc - by ooops (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

#4505034
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34989) - you deserved it (78700)

On 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm - kids - by bubbalicious (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my wife gave me head lice on purpose so I would have to cut off the ponytail that I've been growing since '99. FML

#3830576
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27722) - you deserved it (87692)

On 07/17/2009 at 12:59pm - love - by anonamous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my suburban, white boyfriend of two years told me he wanted to tell me something serious. He sat me down, looked me in the eye and said "I want to be gangster." I started laughing thinking he was joking. He was 100% serious. FML

#3600725
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59281) - you deserved it (7115)

On 07/09/2009 at 1:17am - love - by hatboxghost (man) - United States

Today, I was at McDonald's and I was going through the drive-thru. As I was driving away, I checked my food and the lady had given me a Night at the Museum Happy Meal toy by mistake. I got so excited that I crashed the car into a pole. I'm 36. FML

#2966896
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27929) - you deserved it (64457)

On 06/17/2009 at 12:35pm - misc - by NotSoYoung (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was driving on the motorway when a cop car made me stop. It was a routine check and when they said "Have you been drinking?" of course I said no. To that, my 6 year old sitting in the back screamed "Yes she did! She's lying I saw her drink!" I had drunk a milkshake. FML

#2593679
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100525) - you deserved it (6380)

On 06/04/2009 at 8:17am - kids - by Kimmiko (woman) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, my mom informed me that she wouldn't be joining the rest of the girls in the limo ride to the church for my wedding ceremony because she wants to have her car with her. Why? Because she is planning to leave my wedding reception half way through to go home and take her dog out to pee. FML

#2357341
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47235) - you deserved it (4316)

On 05/27/2009 at 9:40pm - animals - by KitKat270 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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