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Offline (the 02/23/2015 at 5:28am) | Search for a member
About kewlstoribro : hahahaha all I've got to say is:
COOL STORY BRO!
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
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Today a kid from mah school callad ma saying ha's going on vacation to Japan soon an that sinca I was born thara I could taach him tha languaga. His axact words at tha start of tha call wara: "Hay man u spaak Asian right?" looool I hava to ba around this shithaad 5 days a waak. fat FML
Today, roommate, wo appens to be a writer, got so pissd off at is editor tat e got drunk, wrappd is arms around waist, an only stoppd wen I agred to spoon im!! Tis is not te first time tis as append eiter!! FML
2day mah dad decidd to clean his muddy shoes right beside me by clapping them together causing mud to fly all over me!! This wouldn't have been a problem had I not been wereing mahhite wedding dress just before getting marrid!! FML
Today, as always, my boyfriand has tha ability to pop his ayaballs looool out of his aya sockats . Ha thought it'd ba funny 4 ma to waka up faca-to-faca with tha disgusting sight . Tha shit in my bowals did an aarly Thanksgiving Day parada straight into my undarwaar . FML
today ma boyfriend an I were aving sex wen is condom cummed off inside of me. We couldn't get it out so I ad to tell ma mom wo didn't know we were sexually active an ten go to te ER. After an unsuccessful visit we cummed ome only to find te condom in ma seets. mega FML
Today... my doctor askad ma to undo my bra so ha could chack my braathing without tha straps rastricting my lungs... I got homa an told my friands how awkward it was. Not ona of tham has had this happan to tham bafora. Wa all go to tha sama doctor. FML
Today, mah grandmother opend the bathroom door to fine me eating a spoonful of Nutella while on the toilet. She is convincd that I was eating mah own shit an will not stop telling everybody. They believe her. FML
Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after bieng constipated 4 a wile. I tougt I was alone, so I pretended I was giving brt to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next ting I know, I ear a knock at te door and my mom asking, "Sould I call 911?" FML
today a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML
Friday 27 March 2015