[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

kewlstoribro

Search for a member

kewlstoribro
  • Town/Country : Pangaea
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 September 1987 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 323
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kewlstoribro : hahahaha all I've got to say is:
COOL STORY BRO!

kewlstoribro's last visitors

upyourzlolzlolmigoshSoSickWithItICATigerAlexisthebestestSebastian_NGcrownlogicSenior29FreezeAmethystRainIamnotmyself

kewlstoribro's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of kewlstoribro's badges

kewlstoribro's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (7560) - you deserved it (1249)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, I got my period at school. I didn't notice until a boy asked me if I'd killed someone in my pants. FML

#18802819 (212)

I agree, your life sucks (33154) - you deserved it (2574)

On 01/14/2012 at 2:47am - health - by shitttyyyday - United States

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML

#18772275 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (3244) - you deserved it (7581)

On 01/11/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by bunnyluver4545 - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked a waiter at a restaurant if I could go in the kitchen to compliment the chef. She turned out to be really pretty, so trying to be cool, I leaned back onto what I thought was a table. It turned out to be a stove, and my shirt caught fire. FML

#18750277 (133)

I agree, your life sucks (8045) - you deserved it (20356)

On 01/08/2012 at 8:51pm - love - by Tiana - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML

#18744677 (323)

I agree, your life sucks (37982) - you deserved it (33896)

On 01/08/2012 at 9:36am - intimacy - by omgwhyme (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I arrived home. I'd left for a business trip 5 days earlier, and trusted my husband with our young boys. As soon as I stepped in the door, I noticed my son had thinner hair than when I'd left. He then showed me an empty container of Nair. FML

I agree, your life sucks (16056) - you deserved it (1848)

On 01/07/2012 at 7:50pm - kids - by ProudMama (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my Christmas tree was finally shipped. FML

#18715700 (181)

I agree, your life sucks (25113) - you deserved it (2808)

On 01/05/2012 at 12:13pm - misc - by awesome - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

#18698902 (207)

I agree, your life sucks (10319) - you deserved it (1980)

On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, the girl I've had a crush on for years asked if I could be her "emergency gay friend". Worst part? I said yes. FML

#18425208 (206)

I agree, your life sucks (18785) - you deserved it (15448)

On 12/04/2011 at 3:36am - love - by lifesucksbigtimefuys - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

#18404973 (261)

I agree, your life sucks (30444) - you deserved it (6859)

On 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by pops up - United States (Missouri)

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902 (412)

I agree, your life sucks (13841) - you deserved it (53861)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

I agree, your life sucks (17934) - you deserved it (2950)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

#17753266 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (27331) - you deserved it (16139)

On 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML

#17718767 (383)

I agree, your life sucks (31342) - you deserved it (5120)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:13am - misc - by CaseyFpC85 - United States (Florida)

Today, I needed to pay off a $35 parking ticket. To try and get some sort of revenge, I went to the bank and got 3,500 pennies, dumped them into a bucket, and refused to pay with anything besides the pennies. They called the police. I was arrested and cited $147. FML



Your account

↓ Categories

FML's blog

05/15/2012

The whole blog

Switch to FML for visually impaired

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: