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kenoswild

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kenoswild

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  • Number of visits : 980
  • Number of comments : 149
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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kenoswild's page activity

Visits<b>zombiekiller52</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 6:47am<b>caro1190</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:50am<b>RainbowxxVeinsx</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 8:34pm<b>oxythemoron</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 3:29pm<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:02am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 9:14am<b>Iwannabetreo</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 6:27am<b>TheNerdKing</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 12:19am<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 7:41pm<b>Raidriar</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 11:46am<b>Dozer1988</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 9:26am<b>carabobara</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 10:00pm<b>Godsofdracos</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 10:34am<b>El_Mojiiito</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 6:28am<b>Rissaboo180</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 7:42pm<b>crazyoneshereb</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 8:18pm<b>MichelleRuzicka</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 10:19pm<b>Trekos</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 1:20pm

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100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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kenoswild's favorite FMLs

Today, I was speeding a little on the highway. I thought I saw a police car, so I slammed on my brakes, causing the person behind me to rear end me. The "police car" I saw was just a broken down car on the side of the road. FML

#14023247
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5306) - you deserved it (42791)

On 11/29/2010 at 12:34pm - misc - by fuckina (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend confessed that he felt so insecure he submerged my $80 vibrator in water to eliminate the competition. FML

#13994749
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29267) - you deserved it (14107)

On 11/27/2010 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML

#13986029
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11890) - you deserved it (27458)

On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States

Today, in the wee hours of the morning I decided to make a naked dash to the bathroom, unfortunately, my dad decided to do the same thing at the exact same time. FML

#13874873
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35227) - you deserved it (8901)

On 11/17/2010 at 8:26am - misc - by mydadsawsooomuch (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I tripped on a step that said "Watch your step." Two hours later, I hit my head on a sign that said "Mind your head." FML

#13823119
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27307) - you deserved it (12998)

On 11/13/2010 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got back from a three week trip in the Alaska back-country. I survived climbing fatally steep mountains, white water rafting in a freezing glacier river, and a near bear attack. Despite all that, a badly thrown frisbee managed to split my eyebrow in half. FML

#13105771
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22548) - you deserved it (3799)

On 09/18/2010 at 10:54pm - misc - by Gabby125 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML

#7143279
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36488) - you deserved it (2718)

On 01/04/2010 at 8:34am - health - by Soresack (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML

#4596913
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60536) - you deserved it (13267)

On 08/17/2009 at 9:50am - misc - by malebonding (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML

#4350390
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23266) - you deserved it (59338)

On 08/07/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by scaredshitless (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

#1815413
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75398) - you deserved it (8412)

On 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by airport (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. After spending 20 minutes on the phone with AAA, and then waiting a half hour, the guy showed up, he stuck his hand in the drivers side window and asked, "You couldn't just reach in?" I forgot I left the window open. FML

#1054531
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10511) - you deserved it (98807)

On 04/17/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by .... (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was sifting through my parents old home movies. I put in one and was horrified to see my parents having sex. I immediately ejected the tape and looked at the label. It said "Bermuda, 1989". They've told me I was conceived in Bermuda around that time. I've seen my own conception. FML

#391986
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (174467) - you deserved it (34156)

On 03/16/2009 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by ihatevideos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my parents left for work before I had to leave for school and I decided to skip. I stayed by the phone, expecting the school to call so I could pose as my parent and excuse my absence. The phone rings and I pick up. It's my Mom, calling to leave my dad a message on the machine. FML

#194892
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7870) - you deserved it (86391)

On 03/03/2009 at 11:49am - misc - by noway6000 - United States (Virginia)



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