kenoswild

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Offline (the 07/05/2015 at 5:01am)

kenoswild

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2042
  • Number of comments : 149
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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kenoswild's page activity

Visits<b>royallymessedup</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 2:28am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 9:44am<b>panromantic</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 3:51pm<b>AnthriX95</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 2:07am<b>kayana153</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 4:59pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 11:58am<b>thethunderbolt</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 5:52pm<b>EyesofStone</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 9:43pm<b>rhiannahoward14</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 1:29am<b>YourAuntsCousin</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 1:03am<b>sevazilla</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 4:58pm<b>zombiekiller52</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 6:47am<b>caro1190</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:50am<b>RainbowxxVeinsx</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 8:34pm<b>oxythemoron</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 3:29pm<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:02am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 9:14am<b>Iwannabetreo</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 6:27am

Fucked!<b>kayana153</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 10:59pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 5:58pm

kenoswild's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of kenoswild's badges

kenoswild's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the airport, when a lady came up and loudly asked if she could sit next to me. I have serious social issues, so to avoid having to talk to her, I pretended I was deaf and couldn't hear her. She immediately broke out her sign language skills. FML

by human lava lamp / 03/10/2013 at 3:54pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding at the natural foods market. It's the first time I've seen a woman's nipple in over two years. I've been married for ten. FML

by themouseman1212 / 03/10/2013 at 12:13pm / United States / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend accused me of being a feeder, saying that's why she's been putting on so much weight. When I said it might be because she eats at McDonalds everyday, and that I was willing to start cooking low-calorie foods for us, she hit me. Then she went to McDonalds. FML

by Raiden / 03/10/2013 at 12:03pm / United Kingdom (Barnsley) / Love

Today, I decided to change my hair color. After waiting in anticipation, I took a shower to rinse out the dye and reveal my new, blue hair. Rinsing revealed not only blue hair, but blue skin caused by the watered dye running over my body. I now look like a smurf, and it's not coming out. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2013 at 1:10am / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got fired from my job because I "look too grumpy." FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2013 at 2:28am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I was sitting in the park with my new dog; I got her from the pound last week. We were enjoying the sun when I noticed that every time a black person walked past, she'd bark like crazy. Great, my dog is a racist. FML

by Anonymous / 10/02/2012 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I heard of an inevitable world-wide bacon shortage on the news. FML

by bacon lovers worst nightmare / 09/26/2012 at 2:57am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I stumbled across "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" on TV and realized that these awful freaks are going to make more money than I ever will. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2012 at 6:29pm / United States / Money

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

by wtf is wrong with my country / 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my boyfriend spitting the mouthwash back into the bottle, because, "this stuff is really expensive." FML

by Laura / 05/03/2012 at 3:55am / France / Love

Today, I met a guy while out with some friends. He kept blowing up his cheeks, so I did it back to him and asked him why he did it. He pulled out a card from his wallet and pointed at it. It was a card saying he may have speech or facial difficulties because he had a stroke when he was 12. FML

by Holls / 04/12/2012 at 9:47am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went driving for the first time. I made it twenty miles to my step mom's house, and didn't stop until I was inside the garage. Too bad the garage door was closed when I got there. FML

by meganisabella / 03/11/2012 at 5:15am / United States / Transportation

Today, I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on and on about how incompetent I was for not stocking the movie she was looking for. It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough for me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns". FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2012 at 5:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was the 10th caller on a radio show. I answered the question correctly. The DJ informed I won a free air guitar of my choosing. I yelled with excitement over the air. The DJ then instructed me how to use my new air guitar. FML

by h4rdy / 03/09/2012 at 11:55am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I got into a fight because I refused to let him use my finger nail to clean the plaque off his teeth. FML

by Anonymous / 03/08/2012 at 7:30pm / Canada / Love