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kelxdao

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kelxdao

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9642
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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kelxdao's page activity

Visits<b>thefredrick</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:16pm<b>grritsshay</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 11:20pm<b>OzzMonster</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 7:47pm<b>Jojohn0</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 4:41am<b>totallybananas</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 5:00am<b>coried91</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 11:01pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 2:29pm<b>thesnypist8</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 8:32am<b>BFons</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 12:17pm<b>tatertot1985</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 3:16pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 5:37am<b>pianoman348</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 12:02am<b>Welshite</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 4:47pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 7:30pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 10:42am<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 9:08am<b>TedNg</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 2:18am<b>tartar18</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 4:04pm

kelxdao's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of kelxdao's badges

kelxdao's favorite FMLs

Today, I started work cleaning a customer's pool. I think her husband watches too much porn because he keeps glaring at me from the windows, and I overheard him telling his wife that he knows what's "going on" and that he's "not gonna let it happen". FML

#21397916
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27556) - you deserved it (2012)

On 04/22/2015 at 11:44am - work - by cock blocked (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came out as bisexual to my 17-year-old sister. She was quiet for a second, then told me she knows for sure I only have "girl parts". I had to explain to her the difference between being bi and being a hermaphrodite. FML

#21397585
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27117) - you deserved it (3008)

On 04/21/2015 at 7:00pm - intimacy - by Notthatone (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out the only reason my parents haven't kicked me out yet is because of my OCD which makes me clean the house every single day. FML

#21397145
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29179) - you deserved it (3098)

On 04/20/2015 at 10:42pm - misc - by Zach - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was sent to the front office for having blood shot eyes and smelling like smoke. I just didn't get enough sleep and had trouble putting my contacts in, and I always smell like smoke because of my parents' excessive smoking. They didn't believe me. My parents had to come in to back me up. FML

#21397058
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28979) - you deserved it (1896)

On 04/20/2015 at 8:16pm - health - by Phabia - United States (Iowa)

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, I picked up a rock outside and put it in my pocket because it looked cool. A teacher holding the door open stopped me and sent me to the principal. I was confused and asked the teacher why the strict action. She replied that someone has been putting rocks in the toilet. I got a detention. FML

#21386851
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28382) - you deserved it (2511)

On 04/03/2015 at 2:08am - misc - by overreacting - United States (Missouri)

Today, at the DMV I was told I had to prove, with a doctor's note, that I was an amputee and my disability was permanent to get my placard. Apparently, setting my prosthetic leg on the counter wasn't proof enough, and is considered "threatening". The police were called. FML

#21386342
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38004) - you deserved it (2084)

On 04/02/2015 at 2:43am - health - by usadisvet (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

#21381783
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38210) - you deserved it (3121)

On 03/26/2015 at 9:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML

#21379710
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32826) - you deserved it (6568)

On 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by oooooops (man) - United States

Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML

#21378385
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25842) - you deserved it (3094)

On 03/20/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I finally went to the doctor's about my severe anxiety. I am so used to putting on a happy performance around people that she didn't believe anything was wrong with me. FML

#21376536
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (173) - you deserved it (3240)

On 03/17/2015 at 5:35pm - health - by scared - Australia (Queensland)

Today, for the second time, I had an argument with my mother about whether William Shakespeare was a real person or not. FML

#21376501
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25100) - you deserved it (2255)

On 03/17/2015 at 4:35pm - misc - by ohno - United States (Michigan)

Today, my dad decided that the best way to alleviate my crippling depression is to talk to me in a baby voice. FML

#21374972
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28488) - you deserved it (2972)

On 03/15/2015 at 10:57am - health - by nerderer (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while flirting with a cute nurse at my dad's bedside, I accidentally let a noxious fart slip out and she thought the foul smell came from my sleeping father soiling himself. I let her roll him over and check his ass while he cried out in pain because I wasn't man enough to own up to it. FML

#21369082
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21) - you deserved it (86)

On 03/06/2015 at 1:18am - health - by UncleMonkey (man) - United States (California)

Today, my teacher reached over to hand me a paper. I thought it would be funny to flinch and say, "Dad, please don't hit me". Unfortunately, he didn't think it was a joke, so I got questioned by the on-campus officer. FML

#21368562
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14318) - you deserved it (42670)

On 03/05/2015 at 9:32am - misc - by jlol - United States



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