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kelxdao

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kelxdao

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12838
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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kelxdao's page activity

Visits<b>dantee2005</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 9:12am<b>thefredrick</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:16pm<b>grritsshay</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 11:20pm<b>OzzMonster</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 7:47pm<b>Jojohn0</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 4:41am<b>totallybananas</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 5:00am<b>coried91</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 11:01pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 2:29pm<b>thesnypist8</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 8:32am<b>BFons</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 12:17pm<b>tatertot1985</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 3:16pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 5:37am<b>pianoman348</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 12:02am<b>Welshite</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 4:47pm<b>MandyCat484</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 7:30pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 10:42am<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 9:08am<b>TedNg</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 2:18am

kelxdao's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of kelxdao's badges

kelxdao's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

#21446710
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24305) - you deserved it (4247)

On 07/24/2015 at 8:12pm - intimacy - by strangely - United States (California)

Today, I'm grieving over the death of my best friend of 9 years. My mom wasted no time arriving at the conclusion that I must be hormonal and pregnant with his child. Apparently it's not normal for a woman to cry so much over a man, unless they've been fucking. FML

#21446500
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27115) - you deserved it (1586)

On 07/24/2015 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my boss called me in to have a serious talk. The "serious talk" was him asking me to notify him of my menstrual cycle ahead of time so he can "avoid that shit". FML

#21446059
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23353) - you deserved it (2376)

On 07/23/2015 at 3:00pm - work - by Ma_Nikka (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom told me that she heard me and my best friend in my room grunting and talking about how hard we were. She said she loved me and accepted me no matter what. Thanks mom, but we were working out. FML

#21445547
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23281) - you deserved it (4799)

On 07/22/2015 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, a girl with a picture of One Direction as her desktop asked if I wanted to partner with her on a 70% law assignment. Two hours after saying no, I found out that she's a legal genius with a guaranteed job in the field and a near perfect GPA. FML

#21445322
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10381) - you deserved it (44813)

On 07/22/2015 at 2:18am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I attended a new class at college. It was a class to help people with Asperger's adjust to college, which my parents pushed me into taking. It was incredibly condescending and insulting, and it felt like a class for preschoolers. My parents won't let me drop the class. FML

Today, my religious friend and I ended up having wild sex in the back of his mom's minivan. We got interrupted by a priest knocking at our window. Well played God, well played. FML

#21444515
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26216) - you deserved it (7148)

On 07/20/2015 at 1:48pm - intimacy - by Marika - United States (California)

Today, after hours of waiting in line, I finally met my favorite band. After posing for a picture, I looked at my phone to find that instead of taking a picture with me and the band, my friend took selfies. FML

Today, I was talking to my friend, who was telling me he's having suicidal thoughts lately. He then said he'd be back in a few minutes. Nearly an hour passed. I panicked, thinking he'd offed himself. Several minutes after I called the emergency services, he messaged me, saying "K, back." FML

#21443864
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25275) - you deserved it (2737)

On 07/19/2015 at 2:49am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I got a nose piercing. I was asleep at the time in my backyard, and the piercer was a snake. FML

Today, my boss told me I wasn't getting the promotion I'd been angling for. I was so pissed off, I ranted to a coworker about it over lunch. Turns out my boss was just testing how I dealt with rejection before making his final decision. He overheard my rant and me calling him a Nazi bitch. FML

#21439888
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13742) - you deserved it (33039)

On 07/11/2015 at 2:13am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, my wife was in seemingly never-ending labor. It got so bad, I overheard a nurse in the doorway mutter to a coworker that she hoped my baby would just die or something, so she could finally go take a smoke break. FML

#21439756
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35136) - you deserved it (1693)

On 07/10/2015 at 9:23pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I received a break-up text while in a cramped car with my whole family. I had to choke back tears as we got stuck in traffic with the radio playing one love song after another. FML

Today, my father lectured me for dating a man with "no future". even though he's entering a PhD program next year at a top university. Meanwhile, my dad's last relationship was with a 20-year-old hooker who ended up stealing his credit cards. FML

#21438331
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25901) - you deserved it (1462)

On 07/08/2015 at 2:17am - misc - by WayToGoDaddyHo (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, a very intoxicated man came in to my workplace and bought 50 dollars worth of yogurt, talked about the fact that he shouldn't have to wear pants in public, then threw up all over the register. FML



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