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kelserah

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kelserah
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 373
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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kelserah's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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kelserah's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so insecure, I got scared of what people might think of my fingers. FML

#19549907
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15373) - you deserved it (4908)

On 04/29/2012 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

#19482788
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27257) - you deserved it (2370)

On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I met a guy while out with some friends. He kept blowing up his cheeks, so I did it back to him and asked him why he did it. He pulled out a card from his wallet and pointed at it. It was a card saying he may have speech or facial difficulties because he had a stroke when he was 12. FML

#19454925
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17876) - you deserved it (9013)

On 04/12/2012 at 9:47am - misc - by Holls (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, my mother made me see the doctor to see if I had irritable bowel syndrome, on the account of how often I go to the restroom. I then had to admit I only go in there to get away from my family. My doctor thought it was hilarious. My mom didn't. FML

#19440053
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18487) - you deserved it (1943)

On 04/09/2012 at 10:51pm - health - by emoflowers - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to sit between my parents in the car as they argued with one another for a whole hour over whether or not a thumb is a finger. FML

#19388204
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14709) - you deserved it (1200)

On 04/01/2012 at 12:15pm - misc - by totalloss - United States (Florida)

Today, I spat up blood and had horrible chest pain. My mom still made me go to school, claiming she needed to take the cat to the vet instead of me to the doctor. FML

#19234186
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26862) - you deserved it (1793)

On 03/07/2012 at 5:07pm - health - by Hungrytoothbrush (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

#18937632
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45762) - you deserved it (7743)

On 01/28/2012 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Tiana - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was texting a guy that one of my friends told me about. She gave me his number and told me about how he was deaf. Three hours into great conversation I forgot and asked him what his favorite music was. FML

#18875593
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19391) - you deserved it (7703)

On 01/21/2012 at 11:17pm - love - by Scumbagmemory (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to explain to my husband why putting on dirty underwear after a shower defeats the purpose. We had this discussion in the middle of me giving him head. FML

#18858383
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25095) - you deserved it (8020)

On 01/20/2012 at 12:02am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend, who is supposed to protect me from murderers and rapists, had an emotional breakdown because he was so excited that I'd cooked french fries for dinner. FML

#18833422
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13077) - you deserved it (21426)

On 01/17/2012 at 8:20am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I got my period. Last week, I fell out of a window and landed between my legs on a bush; I have massive swelling down there, and stitches over the ripped flesh. Now I'm bleeding out my period on top of the lingering wounds down there. It hurts even to pee, let alone menstruate. FML

#18130985
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38440) - you deserved it (3780)

On 11/01/2011 at 5:50pm - health - by stitchesupmyass (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML

#18078526
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38484) - you deserved it (3724)

On 10/26/2011 at 2:58am - intimacy - by Darcy (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend told me she knows I've been cheating on her, and is desperate to prove she's "better than that other slut, or it's over between us." I've been pushed down and forcefully kissed ten times now. All because she saw a pic online of me kissing a girl. It was her. FML

#17699087
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34878) - you deserved it (4280)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:34pm - intimacy - by waj9876 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML

#17664853
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21580) - you deserved it (8413)

On 09/04/2011 at 9:27pm - love - by ddll (man) - Singapore

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27797) - you deserved it (5039)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States



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