kelliphant

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Offline (the 10/10/2014 at 11:29am)

kelliphant

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 728
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kelliphant's page activity

Visits<b>anonymuse</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 12:20am<b>B1ackthesun</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 1:22pm

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kelliphant's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

by omg / 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, my cab driver told me about the time he tried to commit suicide by driving off a bridge... while we were crossing a river. FML

by phantomdriver / 03/24/2011 at 6:51pm / Canada (Alberta) / Transportation

Today, at work I had to convince an 80 year old mental patient that she's not Ke$ha and that she really has to put her clothes back on. FML

by Kim / 03/22/2011 at 2:30pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

by WTF / 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm / Health

Today, I discovered that my Facebook profile picture, of me between my boyfriend and a friend, is actually me between my boyfriend and the girl he has been cheating on me with. FML

by ocean555 / 03/06/2011 at 7:27pm / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Intimacy

Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML

by Someone / 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why I'd be angry if he had a foursome with 3 other people. FML

by Dilly_20 / 02/22/2011 at 1:00pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

by bride / 02/14/2011 at 1:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend woke me up by playing with the string of my tampon. FML

by Eva / 02/13/2011 at 4:32am / Intimacy

Today, It was my birthday and my friends came to celebrate it. My parents thought it would be funny to give me a vibrator in front of everybody. FML

by AMIGODO / 02/12/2011 at 10:13am / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Intimacy

Today, I was hanging out with my two friends. My hair was hanging over my upper lip, making it look like I had a big mustache. "Hey, look guys!" I said. "I have a mustache!" "I know," they both said without looking. I'm a girl. FML

by xxxchelsiexxx / 02/06/2011 at 1:02am / United States / Health

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I reached climax. While I was screaming, my 4 year old son comes in with his water gun because he thought I was in trouble. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2011 at 12:10am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my husband decided it would be funny to shout "Woohoo!" in Michael Jackson's voice while having an orgasm. FML

by anonymous / 02/03/2011 at 12:17am / Intimacy

Today, I woke up from my honeymoon to discover the love of my life is a bed wetter. FML

by Anonymous / 02/02/2011 at 4:47pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

by jessica / 02/02/2011 at 3:59pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy