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kelliphant

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kelliphant
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 179
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kelliphant's favorite FMLs

Today, my cab driver told me about the time he tried to commit suicide by driving off a bridge... while we were crossing a river. FML

#15470057
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37957) - you deserved it (3126)

On 03/24/2011 at 6:51pm - misc - by phantomdriver - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at work I had to convince an 80 year old mental patient that she's not Ke$ha and that she really has to put her clothes back on. FML

#15432254
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44750) - you deserved it (4265)

On 03/22/2011 at 2:30pm - work - by Kim - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

#15339337
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39955) - you deserved it (10763)

On 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm - kids - by WTF -

Today, I discovered that my Facebook profile picture, of me between my boyfriend and a friend, is actually me between my boyfriend and the girl he has been cheating on me with. FML

#15220903
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47230) - you deserved it (3663)

On 03/06/2011 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by ocean555 (woman) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, someone started an event on Facebook for tomorrow called Kick A Ginger Day. Over 300 people are attending. There are only two redheads in my school, and I'm one of them. FML

#15078337
428 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39113) - you deserved it (8273)

On 02/22/2011 at 1:30pm - misc - by Someone (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why I'd be angry if he had a foursome with 3 other people. FML

#15078175
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32240) - you deserved it (4704)

On 02/22/2011 at 1:00pm - intimacy - by Dilly_20 - United Kingdom

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44125) - you deserved it (8911)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend woke me up by playing with the string of my tampon. FML

#14955015
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40943) - you deserved it (5629)

On 02/13/2011 at 4:32am - intimacy - by Eva - Sent from mobile version

Today, It was my birthday and my friends came to celebrate it. My parents thought it would be funny to give me a vibrator in front of everybody. FML

#14948054
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29363) - you deserved it (4179)

On 02/12/2011 at 10:13am - intimacy - by AMIGODO (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I was hanging out with my two friends. My hair was hanging over my upper lip, making it look like I had a big mustache. "Hey, look guys!" I said. "I have a mustache!" "I know," they both said without looking. I'm a girl. FML

#14861457
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21957) - you deserved it (6665)

On 02/06/2011 at 1:02am - misc - by xxxchelsiexxx - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I reached climax. While I was screaming, my 4 year old son comes in with his water gun because he thought I was in trouble. FML

#14860597
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14181) - you deserved it (51438)

On 02/06/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my husband decided it would be funny to shout "Woohoo!" in Michael Jackson's voice while having an orgasm. FML

#14820910
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26671) - you deserved it (5598)

On 02/03/2011 at 12:17am - intimacy - by anonymous -

Today, I woke up from my honeymoon to discover the love of my life is a bed wetter. FML

#14813959
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33544) - you deserved it (8448)

On 02/02/2011 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

#14813410
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32426) - you deserved it (6643)

On 02/02/2011 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by jessica - United States (Utah)

Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML

#14169295
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26068) - you deserved it (7204)

On 12/11/2010 at 7:06pm - work - by stifledbyyou (woman) - United States (Louisiana)



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