About keirrat : I love kitty kisses
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keirrat's favorite FMLs
by julia / 06/11/2011 at 7:12am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
Today, I wore my cheerleading uniform to my boyfriend's house. He was a nerd in high school and mentioned a fantasy about hooking up with a cheerleader. I started acting sassy and a little mean, figuring he would enjoy a more realistic experience. Apparently not, because he started to cry. FML
by oc_cheergirl / 04/05/2011 at 10:32pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
by ouch / 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm / United States (Arizona) / Love
Today, we had to discuss our heritage at school. When I told the class that I am German, Japanese, and of the Jewish faith, the teacher loudly laughs at the "irony." Something like this happens whenever I tell people my background. FML
by Anonymous / 03/06/2011 at 12:18am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/23/2010 at 5:07am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
by Wawawiwa / 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm / Namibia (Windhoek) / Intimacy
by pumpkinlover89 / 03/27/2010 at 4:26am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML
by Anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by RaceCar / 02/12/2010 at 2:24pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was sick with the flu so my boyfriend announced that he would make me some chicken soup. It was touching until I stumbled to the kitchen and found out that his "chicken soup" was actually leftover KFC bones boiled in water. FML
by samantha / 01/27/2010 at 9:05am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
by Doomy / 01/07/2010 at 9:43am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a pig kidney dissection in Biology. I see a 'sack' which appeared to contain a liquid. Being the curious type, I cut open the sack, spraying said liquid over me and my desk. My teacher, after giggling, informed me that the liquid was in fact urine. I was pissed on by a dead pig. FML
by Araya / 11/17/2009 at 11:12am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous
by munnyfish / 11/07/2009 at 2:16am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
by GasAttack / 09/07/2009 at 9:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I took my son for a walk to tell him about the passing of our family dog. As we were walking by the river, Ozzy (our deceased dog) was laying on the riverbank. My son thought he just ran away and we found him. Turns out my husband was too cheap to pay the 100$ vet disposal fees. FML
by cheaphubbyswife / 04/04/2009 at 5:19am / Canada (Northwest Territories) / Animals
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, I asked a customer to send me via e-mail the image he wanted me to print. He said, "I don't…