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kbball95

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kbball95

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1781
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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kbball95's page activity

Visits<b>kkscott</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 6:04pm<b>lesalmi</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 3:59pm<b>Sebas11</b> - the 02/12/2014 at 11:11pm<b>im_joking</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 8:47pm<b>theawkwardlife</b> - the 02/28/2013 at 6:13pm<b>bps315</b> - the 12/31/2012 at 4:18pm

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kbball95's favorite FMLs

Today, I needed to pay off a $35 parking ticket. To try and get some sort of revenge, I went to the bank and got 3,500 pennies, dumped them into a bucket, and refused to pay with anything besides the pennies. They called the police. I was arrested and cited $147. FML

Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML

#17695562
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35193) - you deserved it (4309)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:52am - love - by I_dislike_Twilight (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML

#17695095
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8447) - you deserved it (63434)

On 09/08/2011 at 6:00am - health - by Stuck (man) - United States

Today, after falling on my way out the door, hitting a bird with my car, and sitting in an hour and a half of traffic, I remembered I had the day off work. FML

Today, I lied to my diary about getting laid. FML

#17686832
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41211) - you deserved it (28104)

On 09/07/2011 at 4:51am - intimacy - by sadsadperson (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got junk punched by a midget in Sears for giving him "a funny look." I was trying to read the price of the fridge he was standing in front of. FML

#17683604
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26492) - you deserved it (2516)

On 09/06/2011 at 9:14pm - misc - by b3ardown23 - United States

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

#17659578
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37619) - you deserved it (9670)

On 09/04/2011 at 5:36am - intimacy - by southernluxe - United States

Today, my husband went in for surgery and handed me an important document. It wasn't a will or anything similar, but a list of items and gold he wanted passed on to guild members on World of Warcraft. FML

#17642132
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29799) - you deserved it (4131)

On 09/02/2011 at 4:02am - health - by WoWWidow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that getting caught in a barbed wire fence isn't as bad as it sounds. Running through a forest at night, tripping over one, rolling down an embankment, and getting swiped by a car, however, is. FML

Today, my wife told our six year old daughter that the devil beats his wife whenever there's a rainbow. Now she won't stop crying. FML

#17635834
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34180) - you deserved it (3768)

On 09/01/2011 at 2:02pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I noticed a young child wandering out onto a busy street. I managed to grab his arm just as he stepped off the sidewalk and yank him away from almost certain death. My reward was his mother, who was on her cell phone the whole time, screaming at me for touching her child. FML

#17629696
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32591) - you deserved it (2120)

On 08/31/2011 at 1:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

#17628790
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24264) - you deserved it (13716)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:02am - health - by Bigpoppa0507 - Canada

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep and completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32179) - you deserved it (3070)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML

#17612047
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13195) - you deserved it (55694)

On 08/29/2011 at 12:22pm - misc - by slut (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought a new goldfish. While leaving my fish on my balcony to go get fish food, I hear a loud squawk and splash, I race outside to see a bird flying off with my fish. FML

#17603044
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15038) - you deserved it (40288)

On 08/28/2011 at 7:29am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



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