This member hasn't filled in the description.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, I wanted to seduce my boyfriend so I put on my sexiest lingerie and started playing mood music. As he was eating dinner, I climbed up on the table and started seductively crawling across to him. The table collapsed under my weight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23531) - you deserved it (36620)
On 02/15/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML
I agree, your life sucks (43427) - you deserved it (4830)
On 02/15/2009 at 4:44pm - intimacy - by miapapaya (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I stood by the wall at a party while everyone else danced and ignored me. It was my birthday party. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48044) - you deserved it (9053)
On 02/15/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by Noname - United States
Today, I found out that when I masturbate at night while watching internet porn I cast a huge shadow on the curtain and the entire street is able to see it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17225) - you deserved it (39975)
On 02/12/2009 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Evil_Egbert (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)
Today, at work, a man walked up the escalator with his chubby kid next to him and asked me where the shoe section was. I said, "For you or your son?" He said, "For my daughter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8723) - you deserved it (23744)
On 02/12/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by Mal2222 (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, a girl entered the public washroom I was washing my hands in. When she saw me, she stopped dead in her tracks. I then saw her go to the door to make sure she was actually in the girl's washroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30312) - you deserved it (3778)
On 02/09/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by a manly woman? (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went to Subway to grab some lunch. As I was paying, the cashier gave me a tip. He told me of a great acne medication that would do wonders. Thanks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18612) - you deserved it (2034)
On 02/07/2009 at 3:09pm - misc - by chichi (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was passing a building and saw a fat, ugly person inside. I started to laugh and noticed it was my reflection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10076) - you deserved it (50151)
On 02/07/2009 at 1:16pm - misc - by name50 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got in line at the grocery store. The woman in front of me looked right at me, turned to her friend, and said "That reminds me, I forgot to get acne cream." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26099) - you deserved it (1666)
On 02/04/2009 at 5:23pm - misc - by 918boyz (man) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, it was the first time I ever saw a vagina in person. It was during medical school training on how to do a pelvic exam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43556) - you deserved it (7836)
On 02/04/2009 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by medstudent (man) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, I had a sexy dream, woke up and started to masturbate quite vigorously. When I finished, I hopped off the top bunk naked to see my brother and his girlfriend laying in the bottom bunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12718) - you deserved it (36822)
On 02/03/2009 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by thermos (man) - United States (California)
Today, I woke from last night after meeting the most amazing man, and after giving him a good morning kiss, roll out of bed to use his bathroom. After using his toothbrush, I go to replace it in his holder only to find not one, but several prescriptions for herpes in his unzipped toiletry bag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14657) - you deserved it (27267)
On 02/02/2009 at 8:42pm - love - by screwed. - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, I'm a shy guy normally, and when I talk to my friends I don't keep eye contact so I always look down even when I'm listening. My friend asked me why I always look at her boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7955) - you deserved it (14532)
On 02/01/2009 at 11:48am - misc - by foo - United States (Illinois)
Today, my best friend was crying because her boyfriend is a retard. I brought my thumb up to wipe a tear off her face, and somehow stuck it up her nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15920) - you deserved it (8726)
On 02/01/2009 at 3:11am - love - by FractalSanity - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, a girl I've had a huge crush on for a long time told another friend of ours to get a life. I, in my infinite genius responded that her mom needed to get a life. She ran out of the room bawling. I got slapped in the face and informed that her mom had died not long ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7128) - you deserved it (23120)
On 02/01/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by Huge A Hole - United States (Kansas)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
