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kaycee1996's FML badges
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kaycee1996's favorite FMLs
by musicalrose_21 / 01/20/2013 at 7:27am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Work
by Anonymous / 01/20/2013 at 12:01am / United States / Love
Today, I woke up following one of the worst nightmares of my life. I was sweating, clutching the sheets, and feeling sick to the stomach. I'd been dreaming of my wedding that's taking place next week. FML
by Anonymous / 01/19/2013 at 6:35pm / United Kingdom (Somerset) / Love
Today, I attended my aunt's open-casket funeral. My sister spent the first quarter of an hour neither grieving nor celebrating her life, but whining that the "cute" clothes my aunt was dressed in could have been handed down to her, instead of being "wasted". FML
by sophietr8 / 01/19/2013 at 3:38pm / Netherlands (Friesland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. The first thing my dad did was comment that given how pretty she looked in our photos, and compared to how she looks in real life, she's amazing at using Photoshop. FML
by dpap / 01/18/2013 at 6:03pm / United States (Iowa) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/18/2013 at 5:50am / United States / Intimacy
by bull-stuff / 01/17/2013 at 10:48pm / United States (South Carolina) / Animals
Today, the lead singer of the band I recently joined blatantly admitted to a fan that the only reason he let me in was because I'm "so fuckin' ugly" that I make the rest of them look "ten times better" in comparison. FML
by sad drummer / 01/17/2013 at 3:50pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML
by Anonymous / 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
Today, I let my friend bleach my hair, which resulted in it falling out in clumps. I spent $150 at the beauty salon fixing it and cutting most of it off. I sent the pictures of my new hair to my friends, and I got the same reply from each and every one of them: "That better be a wig." FML
by goodlord12 / 01/17/2013 at 2:53am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a run with my crush. She expressed how happy she was to have a decent running partner, because the last one kept complaining he thought he might throw up. We got to the top of the hill and I puked right in front of her. FML
by Anonymous / 01/16/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (Hawaii) / Health
Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML
by Kallian / 01/16/2013 at 6:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Kendra_Nine / 01/16/2013 at 1:28pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by gassy / 01/07/2013 at 10:40am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I was at a café with my friends when an elderly man noticed my dimples. He came up to me, stroked them while whispering, "One in a million" then walked out. Now my friends do this to me constantly, even while driving home. I almost hit a tree. FML
by Dimples / 01/03/2013 at 6:35am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…
- Today, I’m in Thailand and I met a monk. The conversation was so deep and interesting that, without… Today, I’m teaching French in a university in India. One of the students asked me if Paris was the… Today, after recently moving to Australia, I saw my first kangaroo. In the refrigerated section of…