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kaycee1996's FML badges
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kaycee1996's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 11/25/2012 at 4:34pm / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Intimacy
by Tymer / 11/23/2012 at 10:56am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Jeanna S. / 11/23/2012 at 10:10am / United States / Animals
Today, my girlfriend dared me to put on her bra and panties and give her a lap dance. Feeling spontaneous, I decided to do it. Just as I was getting really into it, she told me I was on webcam for all her friends. Apparently it was a contest of who had their boyfriend the most whipped. She won. FML
by Embarassed / 11/23/2012 at 1:14am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, in break from tradition, I proposed to my boyfriend. We were at a Japanese Pagoda. Water was trickling everywhere; the moment was perfect. While I was on my knee, after pouring my heart out, he looked wistfully out over the water and said, "So, I was thinking pizza tonight." FML
by but I tried anal and everything / 11/22/2012 at 11:13am / United States (Iowa) / Love
by Ophelia / 11/22/2012 at 12:44am / United States (New Mexico) / Work
Today, I ran into my boss outside of work. She smiled, and started trying to have an in-depth chat with me. I wouldn't have minded, if it weren't for the fact I ran into her at a club, whilst they were having an S and M theme night. And we were both fully dressed up for it. FML
by jobsearching / 11/21/2012 at 3:43pm / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Work
Today, I tried to motivate my 9-year-old sister to clean her room. She said she'd only agree if she could kill me. Thinking she was just kidding around, and not a total psychopath, I said sure. She ran to her room shouting, "Yes! I'm gonna use the big knife!" She's still cleaning now. FML
by anon / 11/21/2012 at 2:34pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids
Today, the car in front of me in the drop-off area at my son's school parked, and the driver got out. I basically leaned on my horn and gave her every dirty look in the book. She said nothing but stared at me as she opened the back of her van to unload her child's wheelchair. I'm an asshole. FML
by AHole / 11/21/2012 at 9:03am / United States (North Dakota) / Transportation
by fatty / 11/21/2012 at 1:20am / Canada (Alberta) / Health
by besviken / 11/18/2012 at 5:53pm / Sweden (Uppsala Lan) / Intimacy
by satega / 11/17/2012 at 4:15am / United States (Missouri) / Work
by Anonymous / 11/13/2012 at 6:34am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money
Today, I was at the library using a computer to order a package. A man sat down next to me mumbling to himself while staring at me. As I got up to go to the printer, he pointed at me and screamed, "I will burn you alive and enjoy it!" All of my info including my address was still on the computer screen. FML
by sarahcurtis213 / 11/13/2012 at 2:36am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was conducting a meeting regarding safety concerns on my field site. While I made a comment, a client rep yelled out that women don't know construction, and that I should be acting like a proper secretary and should get my boss. I'm the Construction Manager. FML
by ConstructionLady / 11/13/2012 at 1:49am / United States / Work
- Today, I realized how badly medical education has ruined me when I couldn't enjoy erotic literature… Today, my boyfriend told me that he gets more pleasure out of using a Q-tip than he does having sex… Today, my 70 year old grandma was yelling at me to take a pregnancy test, in the middle of Walmart.…