Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kaprookie

Search for a member

kaprookie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2747
  • Number of comments : 264
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About kaprookie : Unicorns, skittles, colours and guitars.
My four favouritest things in the world.

kaprookie's page activity

Visits<b>omgpp</b> - 12 hours ago<b>mermaidgirl5413</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:07am<b>Tommypun</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 1:50am<b>purplepineapple</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 5:17pm<b>1644780</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 4:23pm<b>Rhett_15</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 8:29am<b>TeamTurnUp</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 11:08am<b>batman342</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 3:38pm<b>teentee401</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:22pm<b>Bob3332</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 10:49pm<b>robby9917</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 10:55am<b>Yorih17</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:46pm<b>blakebit</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 10:07pm<b>Hildy93</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:31am<b>Robby4800</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 10:24pm<b>hotel135</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 11:03pm<b>poopenis</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 1:51am<b>moliknz</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 5:00am

kaprookie's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

kaprookie's favorite FMLs

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561
451 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7200) - you deserved it (53365)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML

#8250331
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8495) - you deserved it (32842)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:56pm - love - by CrappyValentine (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I slipped on my icy front porch, fell back and hit my head on the step. I tried to get up, but lost my balance and fell halfway into the bush next to the steps. I then looked up to see my very hot, British, Ex-Special Forces next door neighbor laughing so hard he dropped his snow shovel. FML

#7757731
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22650) - you deserved it (2806)

On 01/31/2010 at 9:12pm - misc - by youlyingjerk (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, when I was unpacking all of my stuff, my parents declared that they are going to live in Australia, and have found me a 'friend'. I am a 14 year old girl at boarding school, and my friend is my new foster mum. FML

#7086130
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43905) - you deserved it (2379)

On 01/01/2010 at 5:07pm - work - by manksy (woman) - United Kingdom (North Yorkshire)

Today, when I was unpacking all of my stuff, my parents declared that they are going to live in Australia, and have found me a 'friend'. I am a 14 year old girl at boarding school, and my friend is my new foster mum. FML

#7086130
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43905) - you deserved it (2379)

On 01/01/2010 at 5:07pm - work - by manksy (woman) - United Kingdom (North Yorkshire)

Today, when I was unpacking all of my stuff, my parents declared that they are going to live in Australia, and have found me a 'friend'. I am a 14 year old girl at boarding school, and my friend is my new foster mum. FML

#7086130
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43905) - you deserved it (2379)

On 01/01/2010 at 5:07pm - work - by manksy (woman) - United Kingdom (North Yorkshire)

Today, I found out that my wife had an affair with our marriage counselor. FML

#6480893
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55314) - you deserved it (2767)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:39pm - love - by Nobody (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87359) - you deserved it (14598)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom said I was the worst of her 5 children. My IQ is 130, an honor student, I don't smoke, I don't drink alcohol, or do drugs. I'm the "worst" because I don't go to church every Sunday. FML

#5791977
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44000) - you deserved it (9748)

On 10/12/2009 at 4:23am - misc - by worst (man) - Philippines (Quezon City)

Today, I found some charges on my credit card for two round trip tickets to Las Vegas. Turns out my daughter and her stoner, unemployed boyfriend stole my credit card and flew to Vegas over the weekend to get married. I paid for my daughter's elopement. FML

#5235406
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38647) - you deserved it (3710)

On 09/13/2009 at 7:10pm - kids - by Broeman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found some charges on my credit card for two round trip tickets to Las Vegas. Turns out my daughter and her stoner, unemployed boyfriend stole my credit card and flew to Vegas over the weekend to get married. I paid for my daughter's elopement. FML

#5235406
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38647) - you deserved it (3710)

On 09/13/2009 at 7:10pm - kids - by Broeman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized that my cat has been laid more times than me. FML

#5054885
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23501) - you deserved it (5267)

On 09/05/2009 at 2:31am - intimacy - by LaurahLunatic (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went out to eat dinner with my family to celebrate my 18th birthday. I playfully put 3 straws between my knuckles to make myself look like Wolverine. I turned to my 6 year old nephew and ask, "Who am I?" He then replied with, "An idiot." FML

#4699130
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14710) - you deserved it (46018)

On 08/21/2009 at 1:18am - kids - by Mak10 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, at WalMart, I saw a guy taping a sign that read "Hide and seek world champs!" over the lost children board. I chased him out of the store, then came back to take it down. As I was trying to remove the sign, a huge crowd began cursing at me and threatening me. They thought I'd made the sign. FML

#4651060
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45155) - you deserved it (4477)

On 08/19/2009 at 6:32am - misc - by Dude (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

#4505034
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34915) - you deserved it (78555)

On 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm - kids - by bubbalicious (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: