Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

kapay

Search for a member

kapay

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 22672
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

kapay's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:16pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 10/18/2009 at 1:34pm<b>mariam</b> - the 07/02/2009 at 12:39pm<b>lpmxxo</b> - the 06/12/2009 at 12:56pm<b>THAThappenedtoME</b> - the 06/11/2009 at 4:37pm<b>crazy12</b> - the 05/25/2009 at 10:36pm<b>hellomynameisril</b> - the 05/25/2009 at 7:57am<b>PsycoJester</b> - the 05/24/2009 at 6:03pm<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 05/24/2009 at 4:10pm<b>pnkpanther</b> - the 05/24/2009 at 3:47pm<b>fishstiks</b> - the 05/20/2009 at 1:28am<b>backonmygrizzy</b> - the 05/19/2009 at 9:29pm<b>AndreaKina</b> - the 05/19/2009 at 5:19am<b>nafur15</b> - the 05/18/2009 at 5:56pm<b>chubs</b> - the 05/12/2009 at 2:38pm<b>ilovemysuckylife</b> - the 04/30/2009 at 6:29pm<b>SirLagALot</b> - the 03/21/2009 at 3:15am

kapay's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

kapay's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML

#5181151
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8392) - you deserved it (37802)

On 09/11/2009 at 12:39am - misc - by 0ptimu5 (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, it's my birthday. I'm a pastry chef by profession. Not only did my family buy a cake from my bakery, I had to make it myself and inscribe it with 'Happy Birthday Dad'. The worst part is, they asked money from me to pay for it. FML

#5181062
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41402) - you deserved it (2485)

On 09/11/2009 at 12:33am - misc - by peter (man) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML

#5180905
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12255) - you deserved it (35891)

On 09/11/2009 at 12:23am - love - by suzanneallen (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I heard a knock on my door and, thinking it was my student adviser, opened it. I was greeted by a drunk girl, who pushed her way into my dorm room, informed me that she lived here last year, and then told me that she lost her virginity in my bed. FML

#5180863
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33518) - you deserved it (3201)

On 09/11/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by CollegeFreshman (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I participated in the school play. My family came to see me in the production. All was going well when my dad came up to me and said, "Where the fuck were you? The show sucked." Thanks dad for not recognizing your own daughter. FML

Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML

#5173603
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12452) - you deserved it (69101)

On 09/10/2009 at 7:17pm - love - by itisthedude (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my teenage son called me at work and started screaming abuse at me. He told me how he never wants to see me again and hopes I die a gruesome death. Why does he feel this way? I beat his high score on Bejewelled 2. FML

#5172036
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47245) - you deserved it (7899)

On 09/10/2009 at 6:00pm - kids - by Bewildered (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I was having a really bad day and told my friend at lunch about how stressed I was and he gave me his brownie to cheer me up. After school, he texted me "Did the brownies kick in?" Yes, they did, right in the middle of my English presentation. They were "funny" brownies. FML

#5171509
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44204) - you deserved it (6796)

On 09/10/2009 at 5:34pm - misc - by englishclasshigh (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was driving in the left lane and was suddenly hit by a woman who was in the right lane. I ran off the road, taking out a fence and totaling my car. When the cops asked the woman what happened she responded, "My tom-tom told me to turn left." FML

#5167647
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48785) - you deserved it (2205)

On 09/10/2009 at 12:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, I left on my honeymoon with my wife who is terrified of flying. The pilot announces incoming storms in the flight path, and the man next to me starts saying it's "probably fate" and "we all have to go sometime" and my wife goes into a full panic attack. We haven't even left the ground yet. FML

#5167326
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37365) - you deserved it (2675)

On 09/10/2009 at 11:58am - misc - by siggit - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was leaving my job at a huge mall. I couldn't find my car anywhere, so I panicked and flagged a security officer. I cried while he drove me around for miles in the endless parking lot. Then, suddenly, I remembered. My friend had dropped me off in the morning. FML

#5166474
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8398) - you deserved it (49952)

On 09/10/2009 at 10:15am - work - by ritz (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years told me that I was part of an experiment for her Sociology doctorate. I also learned that the notebooks she's been writing in for the past three years aren't for her "doctorate in literature" as she had told me, they were notes on my behavior for the past 3 years. FML

#5166110
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48839) - you deserved it (3104)

On 09/10/2009 at 9:37am - love - by Dave (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up at my crazy ex-girlfriend's house, naked and disoriented. You know, the kind of crazy like we-didn't-break-up-it-was-just-a-fight-now-we-can-get-married crazy. She says everything's fine now and she's so glad we've "started our family." FML

#5165059
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45708) - you deserved it (15108)

On 09/10/2009 at 6:55am - misc - by drugged_on_arrival (man) - Virgin Islands British

Today, my 11-year-old son and I were going through some old photos. He saw one of me when I was 22 on a beach, wearing a bikini. He said "Wow! Who's that?" Quite proudly I said it was me. He looked at me and said "What happened?" FML

#5164588
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36041) - you deserved it (7013)

On 09/10/2009 at 5:13am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my daughter used the kids potty chair on her own for the first time. Bad: The bucket was not in it so poo hit the floor. Good: she tried to clean it... Bad: with her socks. Good: she decided to clean the socks. Bad: she used the wall. Good: she finally called dad. FML

#5164209
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44591) - you deserved it (4221)

On 09/10/2009 at 3:51am - kids - by Udxero (man) - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: