This member hasn't filled in the description.
Today, my boyfriend of seven years dumped me because he said my cheeks getting way too fat for his taste and he didn't want to be with a chipmunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21744) - you totally deserved it (4224)
On 10/29/2009 at 1:20am - love - by chipmunk (woman) - United States (California)
Today, in class, everyone read my Creative Writing submission. It was a touching story about the unconditional love that exists between dog and his owner. Everybody unanimously agreed that it was probably about bestiality. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16928) - you totally deserved it (3769)
On 10/29/2009 at 1:17am - misc - by Quirk (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got a free temporary tattoo of a scorpion in a packet of potato chips and decided to wear it on my wrist. Whilst I was in the shower, I got a shock, thinking it was a spider. I then lost balance and slipped, banging my head on the faucet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5599) - you totally deserved it (22071)
On 10/29/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I confronted my boyfriend, suspecting that he has been cheating on me during the past few months. He vehemently denied it. Then told me it would never happen again. What? FML
I agree, your life sucks (23418) - you totally deserved it (1318)
On 10/29/2009 at 12:09am - love - by clueless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, it was my wedding day. I gave a speech about the first time my wife and I met. I said I knew she was the perfect woman for me and it was love at first sight. I looked to my right as she stormed off and then realized I had told a story about my ex-girlfriend who was sitting in the crowd. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4528) - you totally deserved it (44959)
On 10/28/2009 at 5:22pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I learned that girls don't like it when you pass out from carrying them to the bed. What they DO like, is telling all their friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17456) - you totally deserved it (5057)
On 10/28/2009 at 1:07pm - love - by thatguy (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my girlfriend's best friend was dumped, and was absolutely depressed. My girlfriend thought she'd show her sympathy by breaking up with me so they "could be single together." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29323) - you totally deserved it (1015)
On 10/27/2009 at 7:13pm - love - by dumped (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my boyfriend was reaching over to give me a hug for no reason. I said "Aww, You're sweet! I love you too!" He looked confused and said, "That's great, but I was reaching for the remote." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16578) - you totally deserved it (3535)
On 10/27/2009 at 5:57pm - love - by Queen_of_Night (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I bought a nice new dress for a work party. But when I went in, a coworker hurried me into the bathroom saying, "Don't worry we can fix this." She thought someone had been sick on me. Thanks. That was just the pattern of the dress. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15228) - you totally deserved it (3778)
On 10/27/2009 at 12:43pm - work - by yper (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I took a trip to Wal-Mart. There's a car wash that they conveniently built right outside of this Wal-Mart. So as I was leaving, I decided to make use of this car wash, not even thinking about the $200 worth of groceries I had just purchased. I drive a pick-up truck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4013) - you totally deserved it (37760)
On 10/27/2009 at 11:36am - misc - by dave (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend of five years gave me the silent treatment, refusing to talk to me or do anything more than glare at me during the entire three hour drive we took this morning. Why? Because I slept with his best friend. In his dream last night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34998) - you totally deserved it (3252)
On 10/27/2009 at 9:27am - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I tried to set up my brand new washer and dryer. How hard can it be, right? After cutting my hand in 3 places on the dryer vent, I finished it off with electrocuting myself. So much for being a domestic goddess. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11226) - you totally deserved it (5336)
On 10/26/2009 at 9:41pm - misc - by annie00016 (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. I started tearing up and telling him that I feel like he never has time for me anymore. He responded with, "I'm hungry." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18361) - you totally deserved it (5564)
On 10/26/2009 at 1:25pm - love - by hanzastfu (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my parents had a fight, which is a pretty normal occurence at our house. But today, they fought over an orange. Dad is now sitting in his bedroom with the aforementioned orange. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18741) - you totally deserved it (1064)
On 10/26/2009 at 6:15am - misc - by Roida (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I searched myself on Facebook. I have a fan page made by some girl in Wisconsin. She has pictures of me on it. Can you say stalker? FML
I agree, your life sucks (20310) - you totally deserved it (2445)
On 10/25/2009 at 8:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
