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kapay
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  • Number of visits : 21871
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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kapay's favorite FMLs

Today, I mailed out all my Christmas cards. As I was relaxing and being impressed with myself for being so organized this year, I saw the stack of Christmas cards on the coffee table. Everyone will be receiving an empty envelope for Christmas this year. FML

#6680637
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7946) - you deserved it (31311)

On 12/09/2009 at 1:58pm - misc - by ChristmasCardDork (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my boyfriend of seven years dumped me because he said my cheeks getting way too fat for his taste and he didn't want to be with a chipmunk. FML

#6050345
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31676) - you deserved it (6681)

On 10/29/2009 at 1:20am - love - by chipmunk (woman) - United States (California)

Today, in class, everyone read my Creative Writing submission. It was a touching story about the unconditional love that exists between dog and his owner. Everybody unanimously agreed that it was probably about bestiality. FML

#6050318
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26075) - you deserved it (6112)

On 10/29/2009 at 1:17am - animals - by Quirk (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a free temporary tattoo of a scorpion in a packet of potato chips and decided to wear it on my wrist. Whilst I was in the shower, I got a shock, thinking it was a spider. I then lost balance and slipped, banging my head on the faucet. FML

#6050280
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9128) - you deserved it (36812)

On 10/29/2009 at 1:15am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I confronted my boyfriend, suspecting that he has been cheating on me during the past few months. He vehemently denied it. Then told me it would never happen again. What? FML

#6049453
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34399) - you deserved it (2520)

On 10/29/2009 at 12:09am - love - by clueless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my wedding day. I gave a speech about the first time my wife and I met. I said I knew she was the perfect woman for me and it was love at first sight. I looked to my right as she stormed off and then realized I had told a story about my ex-girlfriend who was sitting in the crowd. FML

#6042161
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7303) - you deserved it (74653)

On 10/28/2009 at 5:22pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I learned that girls don't like it when you pass out from carrying them to the bed. What they DO like, is telling all their friends. FML

#6039295
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25898) - you deserved it (7968)

On 10/28/2009 at 1:07pm - love - by thatguy (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend's best friend was dumped, and was absolutely depressed. My girlfriend thought she'd show her sympathy by breaking up with me so they "could be single together." FML

#6028042
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39065) - you deserved it (1696)

On 10/27/2009 at 7:13pm - love - by dumped (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend was reaching over to give me a hug for no reason. I said "Aww, You're sweet! I love you too!" He looked confused and said, "That's great, but I was reaching for the remote." FML

#6026948
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22111) - you deserved it (4617)

On 10/27/2009 at 5:57pm - love - by Queen_of_Night (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I bought a nice new dress for a work party. But when I went in, a coworker hurried me into the bathroom saying, "Don't worry we can fix this." She thought someone had been sick on me. Thanks. That was just the pattern of the dress. FML

#6023107
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23548) - you deserved it (6395)

On 10/27/2009 at 12:43pm - work - by yper (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I took a trip to Wal-Mart. There's a car wash that they conveniently built right outside of this Wal-Mart. So as I was leaving, I decided to make use of this car wash, not even thinking about the $200 worth of groceries I had just purchased. I drive a pick-up truck. FML

#6022532
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6542) - you deserved it (57072)

On 10/27/2009 at 11:36am - misc - by dave (man) - United States

Today, I tried to set up my brand new washer and dryer. How hard can it be, right? After cutting my hand in 3 places on the dryer vent, I finished it off with electrocuting myself. So much for being a domestic goddess. FML

#6014859
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15724) - you deserved it (6943)

On 10/26/2009 at 9:41pm - misc - by annie00016 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. I started tearing up and telling him that I feel like he never has time for me anymore. He responded with, "I'm hungry." FML

#6006516
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24603) - you deserved it (6934)

On 10/26/2009 at 1:25pm - love - by hanzastfu (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my parents had a fight, which is a pretty normal occurrence at our house. But today, they fought over an orange. Dad is now sitting in his bedroom with the aforementioned orange. FML

#6003671
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27066) - you deserved it (2067)

On 10/26/2009 at 6:15am - misc - by Roida (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

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