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kamlap

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kamlap
  • Town/Country : Perth, Australia
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 298
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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kamlap's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my boyfriend if I've gained weight. He replied, "Why do you think I've been so often on top lately?" FML

#18472242
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25784) - you deserved it (6072)

On 12/09/2011 at 10:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was cuddling up on the couch with my girlfriend, when my drunken mother walked in the room, slurred out, "Room for one more?" and leaped on top of us. FML

#18468865
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30120) - you deserved it (2677)

On 12/09/2011 at 2:38pm - love - by Vince (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad finally decided to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If you ever decide to have sex, picture my face like this" and pointed to his face, which had a creepy, intense stare. He just ruined sex for me. Forever. FML

#18467751
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40303) - you deserved it (4928)

On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States

Today, I went to Walmart to get some acne cream. As I approached the register, I looked in my wallet for the money. The cashier saw that I didn't have enough money, and before I could say anything, he goes "Just take it, I've never seen anyone who needs it that much!" FML

#17392866
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37631) - you deserved it (3778)

On 08/07/2011 at 12:40am - misc - by Taylor D - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML

#17322552
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24288) - you deserved it (32528)

On 07/31/2011 at 5:45pm - love - by iannie - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

#17315366
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23748) - you deserved it (15277)

On 07/31/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by James (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend's mother walked in on us having sex. He started crying and ran into the bathroom where my clothes were located, leaving me to deal with his mother. Naked. FML

#17313020
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38087) - you deserved it (7301)

On 07/30/2011 at 8:45pm - intimacy - by cutiekenz21 - United States (Oregon)

Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML

#17307885
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31148) - you deserved it (3255)

On 07/30/2011 at 10:07am - misc - by ewww - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was really excited because the girl I'd liked since freshman year asked me out. She came to my house and my mom decided to show her baby pictures of me with tampons up my nose because I'd had a nose bleed. Even worse, there was one picture of me when I was 15 doing the same thing. FML

#17307375
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26297) - you deserved it (8554)

On 07/30/2011 at 8:03am - misc - by tamponface (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I have to take medicine that gives me painful, violent farts. Tomorrow, I have to either get fired or go work in an office that's dead silent. How silent? Last week I heard my coworker drop a paperclip, three desks away. FML

#17305922
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34496) - you deserved it (3003)

On 07/30/2011 at 2:58am - work - by Tootie (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my parents took me on a plane ride for a vacation in Hong Kong. What they didn't tell me was that the "vacation" is extended for three years. FML

#17297166
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40150) - you deserved it (2714)

On 07/29/2011 at 11:37am - misc - by xxxkkxxx - Hong Kong

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37140) - you deserved it (2628)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML

#17068940
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21776) - you deserved it (17520)

On 07/11/2011 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by tony456 (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I got some really bad mosquito bites on the outside of my thighs. They itched, and my jeans prevented me from scratching them, so I unbuttoned my pants, stuck my down my leg and started scratching. My mom walked in, and won't believe I wasn't masturbating. FML

#16723796
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27473) - you deserved it (4658)

On 06/18/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by callie - United States (Louisiana)

Today, this girl I like just told me a funny story about her pooping adventures. We shared a laugh and she told me "I could never say that to my boyfriend, but I can to you. I don't know, it's like the uglier the boy, the more comfortable I am with him." FML

#7256679
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39552) - you deserved it (2742)

On 01/10/2010 at 11:19am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)



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