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kait11

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kait11
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1401
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About kait11 : College student studying criminal justice and psychology-
Work with autistic people
Long brown hair~blue eyes~five foot three and a half inches tall.
Love meeting new people, message me if you want to know more

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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kait11's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend. He won't go on a cruise with me in the gulf of Mexico, because he thinks we will crash into an iceberg like in Titanic. FML

#19950905
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22117) - you deserved it (3120)

On 07/17/2012 at 5:11pm - love - by Alliente - United States

Today, my father, who is going through a serious mid-life crisis, walked into my room, told me to "sit the fuck down," and spent the next two hours ranting about how the Lord of the Rings books prophesy the end of the world this December, and that Sauron is an analogy for "corrupt bankers." FML

#19950706
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15863) - you deserved it (1219)

On 07/17/2012 at 4:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

#19926709
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30676) - you deserved it (3889)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I'm accused of vandalizing a cop car during a night of partying, and in so doing, violating my parole. While talking with my lawyer, who I spent all my savings on, I said he could hire better than his hideous secretary. Turns out she's his wife. I think I'm now more screwed than ever. FML

#19915477
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5140) - you deserved it (51426)

On 07/09/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by jillie minaj (woman) - United States

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, my boyfriend thought he could make a pregnancy test read positive by jizzing on it. FML

#19822088
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23489) - you deserved it (3845)

On 06/21/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by really (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35069) - you deserved it (3815)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I went to meet my girlfriend's parents at her sister's play. The moment I introduced myself, I realized that her father was my probation officer. FML

#19764456
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28261) - you deserved it (17196)

On 06/10/2012 at 5:16am - love - by fernie vazquez - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I went out on his boat. We got in the water and started to have sex when a fishing boat came by and chummed. There's nothing more romantic than bloody fish guts. FML

#19666580
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15027) - you deserved it (8638)

On 05/23/2012 at 5:38am - intimacy - by Fire0fisis (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML

#19648090
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25378) - you deserved it (2245)

On 05/19/2012 at 6:54pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I brought my 90-year-old grandfather into school for a project that required to bring in "a first-hand account" of the Great Depression. He started off by telling the class how in his day, they "threw rocks at black people." FML

#19608717
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22343) - you deserved it (3367)

On 05/11/2012 at 7:52pm - misc - by Class (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
582 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11628) - you deserved it (51470) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML

#19387601
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15712) - you deserved it (28876)

On 04/01/2012 at 10:03am - love - by Jeff make - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I started my research project on horror stories and people's fascination with them. I did some research and wound up reading H.P. Lovecraft. On the upside, I can now pee more easily. On the downside, it's likely to be in my pants. FML

#19340135
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13215) - you deserved it (3481)

On 03/24/2012 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

#19320311
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9553) - you deserved it (59509)

On 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by brooke (woman) - United States (Florida)



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