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kailarahne's favorite FMLs
by unlucky / 09/03/2014 at 1:40pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by soccer8goalie / 09/02/2014 at 10:13pm / United States (West Virginia) / Health
Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML
by SadAndDeaf / 09/02/2014 at 7:38pm / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love
by the3goatlady / 09/01/2014 at 12:22pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals
by leem / 08/27/2014 at 5:21pm / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Transportation
Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML
by JackieD / 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm / United States (Washington) / Kids
Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML
by Anonymous / 08/25/2014 at 1:44am / United States (Ohio) / Geek
Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML
by Anonymous / 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm / New Zealand / Kids
by Anonymous / 08/08/2014 at 2:13am / Singapore / Work
Today, I got a call from my very drunk boyfriend at 1:30am asking for my permission to have sex with a "gross fat chick" he met at a pub, because he "felt sorry for her". The conversation ended with me getting hung up on because I "don't have a heart". FML
by pocketrocket90 / 08/08/2014 at 2:05am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy
Today, as I wandered through the streets of an unfamiliar city, I spotted a cop and darted across the street to ask for assistance. He kindly gave me directions as he wrote me out a citation for jaywalking. FML
by spekledworf / 08/05/2014 at 7:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by younggirl101 / 08/05/2014 at 12:51pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids
Today, while I was waiting for the train, a woman sat next to me. Her dog jumped up between us and I started petting it. She took this to mean we were now close enough for her to tell me in detail about her experience so far going through the menopause. FML
by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 1:36pm / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Transportation
by bertiebeth / 08/02/2014 at 1:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…
- Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,… Today, I was talking with my slightly skinflint girlfriend, who just moved in with me. “I think you… Today, returning home, I found my roommate trying one of my bras. When he saw my shocked face, the…