juanaranda1015

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juanaranda1015

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 October 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1974
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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juanaranda1015's page activity

Visits<b>Raleaf</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 8:45pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 8:56pm<b>blurrr8</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 5:50pm<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 11:06pm<b>tehman117</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 2:04am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 8:32pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 8:46pm<b>dimos4ever</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 4:04am<b>SirDirtyRedD</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 11:10pm<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 1:43pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 8:15am<b>penguinhalo</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 10:47am<b>Jazzyw1997</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 3:24pm<b>BlindDeafGhost</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 2:12pm<b>GreenBeast</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 12:17pm<b>Kellyexpo</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 12:16am<b>CanadiansPlease</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 8:39pm<b>duma191</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 6:32pm

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juanaranda1015's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting at a bus stop and a guy stops in front of me and says "Oh very nice. How much?" I reply "You couldn't afford me." An old guy sitting next to me says "I bet I could" and puts his hand on my leg. I forfeited the bus and walked home in the rain. FML

by rice_cake / 05/22/2009 at 6:52am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, I was accepted to Harvard's law program. Prestigious right? After hearing the good news the only thing my parents talked about over dinner was who they wanted to win American Idol: Adam, Kris or Danny. FML

by NoComparison / 05/13/2009 at 8:59pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted. 'My girlfriend is so stupid she can't even text the right number.' FML

by rawkdinosawr / 05/09/2009 at 11:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Love

Today, I had a massive argument with my boyfriend in which he called me stupid repeatedly. I stomped out of his house and sent a very angry text to my best friend about him. She didn't text back. Then my boyfriend texted. 'My girlfriend is so stupid she can't even text the right number.' FML

by rawkdinosawr / 05/09/2009 at 11:48am / United Kingdom (London) / Love

Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2009 at 8:20pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment and things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

by JAY22 / 03/26/2009 at 7:41am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was going to a concert. I left my wallet at home because I was afraid it would get stolen, or lost or something. After an awesome night, I came back home to find that my house had been broken into, and every dollar that was in my wallet got stolen. FML

by Mkester / 03/24/2009 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found an old dress in my house laying around. I decided to dye it green to wear it out on St. Patrick's day. Turns out it was my grandmother's wedding dress that my sister was planning to wear for her wedding. FML

by Noname / 03/16/2009 at 1:29pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

by Señor Guapo / 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML

by TahRah / 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

by thatsucks / 02/28/2009 at 6:10am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love

Today, I was masturbating lying on the lower bed of my brother's and my bunk beds. I finished jacking off and tried to get up to clean myself I hit my head on metal panel of the upper bed and passed out. Later woke up in my bed... found out my parents came home and saw me passed out naked holding a porn mag. FML

by killmyself / 01/23/2009 at 2:50pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I pointed out to my girlfriend that she wasn't jealous. She replied, "Well actually, I am, I just can't prove it cause no one else is interested in you". FML

by Numou / 12/08/2008 at 2:26am / Love