Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

juanaranda1015

Search for a member

juanaranda1015
  • Town/Country : New York, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 October 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 993
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

juanaranda1015's last visitors

BlindDeafGhostKellyexpoCanadiansPleasegahjTinyTinkererPresAgent

juanaranda1015's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of juanaranda1015's badges

juanaranda1015's favorite FMLs

Today, one my friends died. All my crying gave me a headache, so I asked my boyfriend to bring me some aspirin. My headache didn't go away. Instead, I got diarrhea because my boyfriend gave me laxatives instead of aspirin as a "joke" to cheer me up. FML

#14147287
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45002) - you deserved it (2944)

On 12/09/2010 at 9:23pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while walking past a homeless man, I heard him comment on the woman in front of me saying, "I should come to this side of town more often, there's some hotties here." Then he saw me and said, "Wait, no, I think I'll stay on the other side of town." FML

#14124192
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22031) - you deserved it (3232)

On 12/07/2010 at 8:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a customer at the store I work at asked me what kind of cake I would suggest for her husband's 50th birthday. I laughed and showed her the Grim Reaper cake. She burst into tears and explained that he has cancer. FML

#14041933
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11159) - you deserved it (50378)

On 11/30/2010 at 10:39pm - work - by Username -

Today, I managed to not think too much about how alone I feel living in a strange city, and I went out to find a quiet place to write and eat. After I ordered my meal, I saw that I was the only diner that was sitting alone at a table. Then 'All By Myself' came on the radio. FML

#14040843
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27311) - you deserved it (2867)

On 11/30/2010 at 9:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Italy

Today, my boyfriend told me one of the main reasons he started dating me was because I have the same name as his ex, whose name he has tattooed on his back. FML

#14034734
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30430) - you deserved it (2988)

On 11/30/2010 at 10:50am - love - by tattooed (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was at my psychologist's. We were talking about creative outlets and I told him that I wanted to start playing Dungeons and Dragons again. He starts chuckling, and then says, "Oh, you were serious." FML

#14032735
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11146) - you deserved it (18396)

On 11/30/2010 at 2:16am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I refused to ride with a friend on a motorcycle because it is unsafe and went to take the bus. As I got off the bus, I got hit by a speeding motorcycle and ended up in hospital. FML

#14026959
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26183) - you deserved it (4734)

On 11/29/2010 at 7:25pm - health - by leilei (woman) - Philippines

Today, I learned that I wasn't really allergic to chocolate. My parents made it up when I was a child because they didn't want me to get fat. FML

#13970714
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31384) - you deserved it (3018)

On 11/25/2010 at 2:32am - misc - by wow (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my best friend was fired from the place we both work at because she's a bad employee. After they fired her she said, "If I go, I'm taking my best friend with me." So they fired me too. I actually liked that job. FML

#13958382
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26982) - you deserved it (2751)

On 11/24/2010 at 3:45am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got an electric razor and a lesson from my dad on how to shave my mustache and chin. I also got my period. FML

#13906340
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36071) - you deserved it (3807)

On 11/20/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by Tasha84 - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother was over visiting. My three year old ran out of my room chasing the cat with his toy. He smacked the cat with it, the cat scratched him, he dropped it and ran away. I was busy with the baby so I asked my mom to take the toy away. She walked back holding my pink dildo. FML

#13876258
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21990) - you deserved it (9839)

On 11/17/2010 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by bottomdrawerraider (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I arrived home to find my cat dead and note saying, "Sorry, I tripped over him." Not only is my cat dead, but I was robbed by a polite thief. FML

#13841741
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49016) - you deserved it (2313)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - South Africa

Today, it took me a full ten minutes to finish on the toilet. I was babysitting at the time, and it took the kids those ten minutes to destroy the kitchen and shave the cat. FML

#13840378
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23084) - you deserved it (6771)

On 11/14/2010 at 12:18pm - kids - by nicki - United States (Illinois)

Today, I tried on the new dress I bought for myself. I, for once, thought I looked pretty all right. I asked my dog, "How do I look?" and she threw up on my pillow. My brother can't stop laughing. FML

#13837705
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22823) - you deserved it (3548)

On 11/14/2010 at 4:42am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had a headache when I woke up for school. I had final exams that day, so I took what I thought were 2 advils. They were two sleeping pills. FML

#13837654
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15377) - you deserved it (21557)

On 11/14/2010 at 4:34am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: