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Today, the heating in my house broke down. I called my boyfriend and asked if I could stay at his place until I could get it fixed. He said no, and told me my overgrown leg hair would keep me warm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20255) - you deserved it (8986)
On 12/16/2011 at 3:11pm - love - by Anonymous - Sweden (Hallands Lan)
Today, I'm spending time with my granny, with whom I'm supposed to live with for a few weeks. I've noticed that she repeats the last word of every sentence I say, and now I'm wondering how it's possible for me to now be so horrible that I want to punch a sweet 92-year-old lady in the head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7363) - you deserved it (1479)
On 11/29/2011 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8326) - you deserved it (18423)
On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States
Today, I discovered that for the past 4 years my mother has been slipping meat into my food because she thinks my vegetarianism is a "stupid hippie fad." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21007) - you deserved it (13628)
On 11/26/2010 at 9:17am - misc - by veggieweggie (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Today, I signed up to a Christian website in order to try and 'find God again'. I got banned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11393) - you deserved it (15731)
On 11/26/2010 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous -
Today, I was working at Publix ringing up some 70 year old woman. She says "Man, you're a fast cashier, I like my men fast!" and then gives me a wink. I got really nervous and didn't know how to respond, so not thinking, I quickly said, "Yeah, me too." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17615) - you deserved it (4991)
On 02/22/2010 at 8:29pm - work - by Patrick (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was at McDonald's. I bumped into a guy, and as I was helping him pick up his food, I realized he was cute. I began smiling and I was about to introduce myself, when he began laughing and said ,"It's you! I've heard about you!" He left laughing. I still don't know who he is, or what made him laugh. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20425) - you deserved it (2173)
On 02/18/2010 at 1:38am - misc - by Lizzielollipop816 (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got mauled by a cat named Mr. Sprinkles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17767) - you deserved it (3806)
On 02/07/2010 at 10:19pm - animals - by zzdug (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I walked past a group of men at the mall and one of them mooed at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20326) - you deserved it (4564)
On 02/05/2010 at 9:18pm - misc - by LynnJ (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to the store with my 4 1/2 year old daughter. When we got to the cosmetics aisle, she asked what make-up was for, I told her it was to make women prettier. My daughter then told me it was a good thing I wear make-up because I was ugly and that I might scare off my husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21285) - you deserved it (2705)
On 02/04/2010 at 10:53pm - kids - by 102496 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I got rear-ended. In possibly the scariest part of downtown. At night. By a man who spoke hardly any English but managed to ask if I would go out dancing with him instead of calling my insurance company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20484) - you deserved it (1450)
On 02/04/2010 at 1:34am - misc - by city_girl (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19047) - you deserved it (3150)
On 01/31/2010 at 7:24pm - love - by JK (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was working at IHOP serving a table full of drunk idiots. After an hour of taking care of them I went to clean up their mess to find the tip they had left me. On a napkin a girl had wrote "Here's your tip for the night: Don't play leap frog with unicorns." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20764) - you deserved it (1751)
On 01/28/2010 at 7:14pm - work - by Juggalette (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went out on a date with a guy significantly older than myself. I told him I really liked him because I can have an intelligent conversation with him, unlike most guys my age. He told me he just wanted to get into my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20340) - you deserved it (7378)
On 01/28/2010 at 8:59am - love - by thisucks (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)
Today, I was sick with the flu so my boyfriend announced that he would make me some chicken soup. It was touching until I stumbled to the kitchen and found out that his "chicken soup" was actually leftover KFC bones boiled in water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22731) - you deserved it (2737)
On 01/27/2010 at 9:05am - misc - by samantha (woman) - Singapore
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