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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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jpwdragon

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jpwdragon
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 471
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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jpwdragon's favorite FMLs

Today, I was arguing in the car with my boyfriend about who was the better driver. Being so incensed by the fact that he thought he was better made me completely zone out, and run a red light. FML

#14197688 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (3641) - you deserved it (24269)

On 12/14/2010 at 12:15am - misc - by driver26 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend ditched me, saying he had some important things to do. When I checked on him a while later, I found out what was so "important". A game called Robot Unicorn Attack. FML

#13738415 (247)

I agree, your life sucks (17208) - you deserved it (6519)

On 11/06/2010 at 1:24pm - love - by anonymous_0505 (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I tried to get over my childhood phobia of syringes by donating blood. The phlebotomist hadn't even touched the needle before I started sobbing hysterically. They made me leave. FML

#13219092 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (13667) - you deserved it (8412)

On 09/27/2010 at 3:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I finally decided to do regular biology rather than honors biology, thinking honors would be too hard. My first day in regular biology, my lab partner asked me whether a rock was alive or not. FML

#12823481 (232)

I agree, your life sucks (22564) - you deserved it (7864)

On 08/30/2010 at 3:55pm - misc - by Shelby (woman) - United States (Illinois)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after nearly 2 years of continuous fighting in Afghanistan, my unit came home. We were booed at the airport. FML

#12810587 (225)

I agree, your life sucks (74119) - you deserved it (7230)

On 08/29/2010 at 8:39pm - misc - by soldierboy - United States

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566 (204)

I agree, your life sucks (14139) - you deserved it (1491)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got sent to detention for saying, "that's what she said" after a girl in my class said, "push a little harder" while disecting a frog. FML

#7894652 (189)

I agree, your life sucks (19942) - you deserved it (749)

On 02/05/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by eemp - Sent from mobile version

Today, I came home from a year long backpacking trip in Europe. During my absence my parents divorced, dad took the house and most of the money, sister is seven months pregnant, brother was arrested for statutory rape, and my mom pawned all my stuff to buy booze to "cope." Oh, and my fish died. FML

#6989911 (295)

I agree, your life sucks (60049) - you deserved it (2766)

On 12/28/2009 at 7:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was outside, peeing on a cactus. Then all of a sudden my dog jumped on my back, knocking me into the cactus. FML

#6435507 (129)

I agree, your life sucks (8312) - you deserved it (34875)

On 11/24/2009 at 12:11pm - animals - by yomamma787 - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML

#5811871 (363)

I agree, your life sucks (5381) - you deserved it (69163)

On 10/13/2009 at 2:54am - love - by PanFace (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I flew from New York to San Fransisco with my wife. We were seated apart and were texting each other about our seatmates in Spanish. I told her the ass of the woman next to me was oozing under the armrest and making my leg sweat. The oozer told me that lots of fat asses can read Spanish. 6 hours to SF. FML

#2177396 (334)

I agree, your life sucks (10615) - you deserved it (50628)

On 05/22/2009 at 11:17am - misc - by mecago (man) - United States (California)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my college economics class had a big test. We all needed a scantron sheet, but some people forgot some. I had an extra one and this really hot girl offered to buy it for $1.00. I said I'd give it to her for her number. She looked around and asked "Does anyone else have an extra?" FML

#668061 (130)

I agree, your life sucks (38029) - you deserved it (20269)

On 03/28/2009 at 8:13pm - misc - by thathurt (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found a bell that had been tied into the tassel of my ski hat by my twin sister as part of a longstanding prank war between us. I'm deaf and have apparently been jingling like an elf for over a week. FML

#489076 (162)

I agree, your life sucks (90115) - you deserved it (6841)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:40pm - misc - by hipprep83 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I told my best friend of 10 years that somewhere along the way I feel in love with him and I think we should be together. His response: "I appreciate the sentiment." FML

#15560 (33)

I agree, your life sucks (20623) - you deserved it (2374)

On 02/08/2009 at 6:34pm - misc - by mer (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, two girls invited me up to their room at 3 am. As soon as we pressed the up button on the elevator, the fire alarm went off. FML

#6093 (64)

I agree, your life sucks (49107) - you deserved it (3579)

On 02/03/2009 at 9:25am - intimacy - by SoClose (man) - Canada (Ontario)