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josephmendesgigg

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josephmendesgigg

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 605
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About josephmendesgigg : Fuck yeah

josephmendesgigg's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:15am

josephmendesgigg's FML badges

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josephmendesgigg's favorite FMLs

Today, my 15 year old girlfriend called to tell me she is pregnant. Her dad is ex-military, and makes a point of cleaning his guns every time I go to her house. FML

#17010843
709 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18659) - you deserved it (95003)

On 07/07/2011 at 3:43am - kids - by shit - United States

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

#16943359
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33065) - you deserved it (3198)

On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my math teacher brought his laptop to tally up all our scores for our report card. He then displayed the results on a big screen in front of the whole class. The ones who failed were marked yellow. I was the only one marked yellow. FML

#15025118
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25343) - you deserved it (19055)

On 02/18/2011 at 4:30am - misc - by thestudent (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, feeling melancholy, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML

#14490240
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28982) - you deserved it (5681)

On 01/06/2011 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after much thought and serious consideration, I nervously admitted to my boyfriend that I'm bisexual. The first thing that he said in response was: "Want a threesome?" FML

#13495592
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16057) - you deserved it (36135)

On 10/18/2010 at 4:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I got married. I was so nervous right before I said my vows that, in the dead silence, I farted. Loud. My brother showed me afterwards, on tape, over and over and over again. FML

#11028124
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38366) - you deserved it (6765)

On 06/07/2010 at 3:03am - love - by flipflop - United States (California)

Today, me and a couple of friends decided to go camping in a national park . When we got there, a ranger came up to us and said, "There have been many sightings of coyotes, don't worry, if they charge you, they'll bluff and flee at the last moment." We met a coyote, it didn't bluff. FML

#10594461
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26501) - you deserved it (3140)

On 05/17/2010 at 7:00pm - misc - by Coyote (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML

#7050962
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8123) - you deserved it (57072)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I sneezed in the shower. When I got out, I got a text from my creepy old neighbor saying "Bless you". FML

#6563359
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48789) - you deserved it (3506)

On 12/02/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by errrmkl46 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was working on a client's roof. Some neighborhood kids thought it would be hilarious if they knocked over my ladder. I was stuck on this roof in serious heat. I caught the attention of a pedestrian to come to my rescue. It was a little old lady. She gave me the finger and left. FML

#4179768
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48427) - you deserved it (2174)

On 07/31/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by roofer (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was interviewed by this TV crew who asked me what I thought of Rhode Island being voted for the second most neurotic state. I thought they said that Rhode Island was the second most erotic state. I commented. FML

#3790297
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36480) - you deserved it (11621)

On 07/16/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by newsgirl (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I decided to take a nap while babysitting my neighbors kids for the day. I was woken up by this obnoxious sound, only to find the youngest kid holding scissors in one hand, a pony tail of hair in his shorts jumping around like a horse, oh, and a bald spot on the back of my head. FML

#3620845
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19058) - you deserved it (54554)

On 07/09/2009 at 8:19pm - kids - by armybrat - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had my boss and his family over for dinner. Our kids played while waiting for dinner to be ready. Just as we were sitting to eat, our 8-year-olds ran out and my son says "Look at Baxter! I found underwear with a tail hole!" They had found my crotchless panties and put them on the dog. FML

#3329727
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38134) - you deserved it (10921)

On 06/29/2009 at 1:07am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, it's my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to iTunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation. FML

#580113
484 comments

I agree, your life sucks (602346) - you deserved it (38014)

On 03/24/2009 at 5:15pm - misc - by happybirthday (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



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