About josephmendesgigg : Fuck yeah
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my 15 year old girlfriend called to tell me she is pregnant. Her dad is ex-military, and makes a point of cleaning his guns every time I go to her house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14811) - you deserved it (69508)
On 07/07/2011 at 3:43am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26848) - you deserved it (2308)
On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my math teacher brought his laptop to tally up all our scores for our report card. He then displayed the results on a big screen in front of the whole class. The ones who failed were marked yellow. I was the only one marked yellow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19950) - you deserved it (16373)
On 02/18/2011 at 4:30am - misc - by thestudent (man) - Philippines (Manila)
Today, feeling melancholy, I took a blanket out to the backyard and lay down to look at the clouds. My dad came out to ask me what I was doing. I told him, he smirked, squatted over my face, and farted. He then ran back inside and told my mom. She laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23265) - you deserved it (4420)
On 01/06/2011 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, after much thought and serious consideration, I nervously admitted to my boyfriend that I'm Bisexual. The first thing that he said in response was: "Want a threesome?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (11900) - you deserved it (26925)
On 10/18/2010 at 4:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, I got married. I was so nervous right before I said my vows that, in the dead silence, I farted. Loud. My brother showed me afterwards, on tape, over and over and over again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33245) - you deserved it (6247)
On 06/07/2010 at 3:03am - love - by flipflop - United States (California)
Today, me and a couple of friends decided to go camping in a national park . When we got there, a ranger came up to us and said, "There have been many sightings of coyotes, don't worry, if they charge you, they'll bluff and flee at the last moment." We met a coyote, it didn't bluff. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20432) - you deserved it (2281)
On 05/17/2010 at 7:00pm - misc - by Coyote (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I had a wrestling match. Someone put Viagra in my waterbottle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39721) - you deserved it (3058)
On 01/22/2010 at 12:06am - misc - by wrestler133 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6046) - you deserved it (43619)
On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I sneezed in the shower. When I got out, I got a text from my creepy old neighbor saying "Bless you". FML
I agree, your life sucks (41472) - you deserved it (2656)
On 12/02/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by errrmkl46 - United States (Arizona)
Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40253) - you deserved it (123733)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was working on a client's roof. Some neighborhood kids thought it would be hilarious if they knocked over my ladder. I was stuck on this roof in serious heat. I caught the attention of a pedestrian to come to my rescue. It was a little old lady. She gave me the finger and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42967) - you deserved it (1828)
On 07/31/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by roofer (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was interviewed by this TV crew who asked me what I thought of Rhode Island being voted for the second most neurotic state. I thought they said that Rhode Island was the second most erotic state. I commented. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32290) - you deserved it (10364)
On 07/16/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by newsgirl (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I decided to take a nap while babysitting my neighbors kids for the day. I was woken up by this obnoxious sound, only to find the youngest kid holding scissors in one hand, a pony tail of hair in his shorts jumping around like a horse, oh, and a bald spot on the back of my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15894) - you deserved it (47938)
On 07/09/2009 at 8:19pm - animals - by armybrat - United States (Virginia)
Today, I had my boss and his family over for dinner. Our kids played while waiting for dinner to be ready. Just as we were sitting to eat, our 8-year-olds ran out and my son says "Look at Baxter! I found underwear with a tail hole!" They had found my crotchless panties and put them on the dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32385) - you deserved it (8317)
On 06/29/2009 at 1:07am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Monday 17 June 2013
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