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jordi55

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jordi55

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3864
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jordi55's page activity

Visits<b>heartofhannah</b> - 5 hours ago<b>nwdt3621</b> - 8 hours ago<b>rlovetx</b> - 14 hours ago<b>Purexinsanity</b> - 15 hours ago<b>melisssa87</b> - yesterday at 11:48am<b>mikelwhalen</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 1:49pm<b>gracehi</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 1:07pm<b>sadistmonkey</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 12:16pm<b>AndyPurdy</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 12:13pm<b>slouie</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 12:02pm<b>PresAgent</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:43am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:18am<b>Violet_Embers95</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 10:06am<b>acg7</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 9:36am<b>steftriv</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 9:14am<b>___Unknown__08</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 6:28am<b>Corey122726</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 6:23am<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 12:17am

Fucked!<b>Purexinsanity</b> - 9 hours ago

jordi55's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of jordi55's badges

jordi55's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat on the kitchen counter in my boxers for ten minutes running my feet under hot water. Why? Because my dad thought it would be funny to superglue my feet together. FML

#18491637
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29512) - you deserved it (2734)

On 12/12/2011 at 1:38am - misc - by lucas - United States (Alaska)

Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML

#18479276
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50174) - you deserved it (3785)

On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Joe (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got stuck driving behind a rather large motorcyclist on a one way road for 30 miles. For those 30 miles, I had a full view of his back fat rolls and butt crack. FML

#18466137
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22736) - you deserved it (3412)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by O__o (woman) - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML

#18456086
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33086) - you deserved it (4645)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:31pm - intimacy - by journey_Jeanne - United States (California)

Today, after being yelled at by our boss because the office computer server has yet another virus, my co-worker and I did a bit of investigating. Apparently, the viruses aren't coming from client emails as we previously assumed. It seems that the problem is really our boss's porn addiction. FML

#18452728
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32761) - you deserved it (2252)

On 12/07/2011 at 1:43pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend shoved a Q-tip up my ass while I was brushing my teeth. FML

#18449583
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35456) - you deserved it (6647)

On 12/06/2011 at 11:39pm - intimacy - by Surprisebuttsecks? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I put a blue toilet cleaner square in the back of toilet. My fiancé called me later on freaking out because he couldn't get the "blue water to go away" when he flushed. FML

#18447759
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23147) - you deserved it (3026)

On 12/06/2011 at 8:38pm - love - by sparklethelette - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was watching porn when I heard my mom call for me. I closed my laptop right as she walked in my room. The sound, however, kept going. FML

#18428813
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18768) - you deserved it (42152)

On 12/04/2011 at 4:39pm - intimacy - by wowthatwould (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was putting up Christmas lights, my younger brother wouldn't stop pestering me. It seems he hadn't forgotten the time I gave myself an electric shock last year, and he wanted to see if I'd do it again. FML

#18419129
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21813) - you deserved it (3260)

On 12/03/2011 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML

#18417408
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34993) - you deserved it (5601)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:04am - intimacy - by trembelwick - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a private number called me telling me to "Beware the water bottles" as soon as a water bottle flew through my open window, hitting me. FML

#18408949
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25274) - you deserved it (3006)

On 12/02/2011 at 12:23am - misc - by waterbottlehit (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I learned that my hairdo must resemble a rat. I found out when a hawk swooped down and dug its claws into my head while I was sunbathing. FML

#18408881
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22528) - you deserved it (5669)

On 12/02/2011 at 12:14am - animals - by inpain - United States (California)

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

#18404973
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40182) - you deserved it (9463)

On 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by pops up - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went into hospital and was being treated by a really cute doctor. Not knowing that I was going to end up here, I put on novelty underwear this morning. Well, at least he found the little green glow-in-the-dark skulls amusing. FML

#18402920
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21117) - you deserved it (5260)

On 12/01/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by Hot Pants (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML

#18398754
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33082) - you deserved it (3955)

On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



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