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jordi55

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jordi55

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 August 1955 (60 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5243
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jordi55's page activity

Visits<b>demix</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 6:59am<b>addioty</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 1:11pm<b>914smv</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 3:45am<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 11:36pm<b>Fidge</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 11:39am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 11:25am<b>Ashd09</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 9:50am<b>ninjuh_wingman</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 9:02am<b>Lalala579121</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 8:53am<b>Sunflora219</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 8:51am<b>confused_wandere</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 8:42am<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 12:45pm<b>Mons</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 9:32am<b>holly_fly</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 2:26pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 11:29pm<b>toasted1</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 3:56am<b>andrmac</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 4:16pm<b>Adamjohn82</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 8:35am

Fucked!<b>texasmade817</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 4:47am<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 9:50am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 3:58pm<b>Purexinsanity</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 7:10pm

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jordi55's favorite FMLs

Today, after careful consideration, I told my wife I really want to have kids. She laughed, until she finally realized I was serious, at which point she flicked me in the balls and said, "Problem solved." FML

#19818500
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27797) - you deserved it (3501)

On 06/20/2012 at 12:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while giving my fiancé a hand-job, my ring got stuck in his pubes. We had to awkwardly get to the kitchen to get scissors. FML

Today, I decided not wear makeup for the first time. My boyfriend asked me if I got punched in the face. FML

#19795334
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27972) - you deserved it (6310)

On 06/16/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by Cassidy Bowen - United States (California)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42249) - you deserved it (4492)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

#19791702
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14397) - you deserved it (28715)

On 06/15/2012 at 10:21am - kids - by habbsrule - Canada

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

#19710494
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31525) - you deserved it (3002) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm - love - by Monsieur-Madame (man) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

#19705817
368 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19534) - you deserved it (46162)

On 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, I met up with my dad after having worked abroad for the past six months. Apparently, during that time he's had a mid-life crisis or been snorting a few too many turds, because he's now some sort of hippie calling himself "Memnoch of Pleiades". FML

#19705574
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20806) - you deserved it (1978)

On 05/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by wtf (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, after my credit card was stolen, the thief made donations to charitable associations. Now I feel bad for asking for the money back. FML

#18973351
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39099) - you deserved it (3757)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:35pm - money - by zobara - Switzerland

Today, while helping my mom to cook, I was reminded that when the fire alarm goes off in our house, dinner is ready. FML

#18967284
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22554) - you deserved it (2676)

On 02/01/2012 at 7:21am - misc - by JohhnyKeroscene - United States

Today, I spent two hours perfecting a really romantic text message to my boyfriend for our one year anniversary. I listed all the things I loved about him, and recalled some of our best times together. Two minutes after I sent it, he replied, "Huh?" FML

#18954605
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26592) - you deserved it (9681)

On 01/30/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by upupandaway (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

#18946444
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25151) - you deserved it (10407)

On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, as I was crossing the slush covered street to catch the bus, I slipped and fell right in the middle of the road. A woman in a car rolled down her window. She didn't ask if I was okay but just laughed and took a picture of me covered in cold, wet slush. FML

#18940266
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27440) - you deserved it (2223)

On 01/29/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by hopeless cluts (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was sitting on a bus. I'm deaf. An old lady looked very angry at me and started talking. Then she looked like she was screaming. I had to type on my phone that I'm deaf. Apparently, I'd been stepping on her foot. She decided to poke me in the eye and type, "Now you're blind too." FML

#18936748
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42645) - you deserved it (3296)

On 01/28/2012 at 7:46pm - misc - by Come on - United States

Today, I went to the gas station, paid the clerk, and drove off without pumping any gas. FML

#18921610
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14346) - you deserved it (37460)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:46pm - money - by ChevRooon - United States



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