jordi55

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jordi55

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 August 1955 (60 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6189
  • Number of comments : 90
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jordi55's page activity

Visits<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 12:27pm<b>pheizer01</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 11:31am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 2:49am<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 2:05am<b>bigbrown24</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 12:25am<b>Ruskiy_Cherep</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 9:32pm<b>melons</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 8:29pm<b>angelnursery</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 10:13am<b>ThrottleJockey</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 9:34am<b>Codezlol</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 6:51am<b>Toonice45</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 11:16am<b>jslaton91</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 12:56pm<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 6:23pm<b>Itineranthuman</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 10:26am<b>nicolai44</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 6:44am<b>warmonger711</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 5:09pm<b>jewgeta</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 1:23am<b>Icefire9461</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 10:52pm

Fucked!<b>Toonice45</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 12:26am<b>Fandomtaco</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 6:55pm<b>texasmade817</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 4:47am<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 9:50am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 3:58pm<b>Purexinsanity</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 7:10pm

jordi55's FML badges

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

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jordi55's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out from her teacher that my daughter in kindergarten gets the little boys in her class to play grown-ups with her. It's basically dry humping and groaning. FML

by Bad Mommy / 06/21/2012 at 1:40am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, after careful consideration, I told my wife I really want to have kids. She laughed, until she finally realized I was serious, at which point she flicked me in the balls and said, "Problem solved." FML

by Anonymous / 06/20/2012 at 12:41pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, while giving my fiancé a hand-job, my ring got stuck in his pubes. We had to awkwardly get to the kitchen to get scissors. FML

by Mega_bug / 06/16/2012 at 10:14pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I decided not wear makeup for the first time. My boyfriend asked me if I got punched in the face. FML

by Cassidy Bowen / 06/16/2012 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

by habbsrule / 06/15/2012 at 10:21am / Canada / Kids

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

by Monsieur-Madame / 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Love

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm / Italy (Lombardia) / Love

Today, I met up with my dad after having worked abroad for the past six months. Apparently, during that time he's had a mid-life crisis or been snorting a few too many turds, because he's now some sort of hippie calling himself "Memnoch of Pleiades". FML

by wtf / 05/30/2012 at 5:34pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, after my credit card was stolen, the thief made donations to charitable associations. Now I feel bad for asking for the money back. FML

by zobara / 02/01/2012 at 11:35pm / Switzerland / Money

Today, while helping my mom to cook, I was reminded that when the fire alarm goes off in our house, dinner is ready. FML

by JohhnyKeroscene / 02/01/2012 at 7:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I spent two hours perfecting a really romantic text message to my boyfriend for our one year anniversary. I listed all the things I loved about him, and recalled some of our best times together. Two minutes after I sent it, he replied, "Huh?" FML

by upupandaway / 01/30/2012 at 6:51pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

by Rachal / 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, as I was crossing the slush covered street to catch the bus, I slipped and fell right in the middle of the road. A woman in a car rolled down her window. She didn't ask if I was okay but just laughed and took a picture of me covered in cold, wet slush. FML

by hopeless cluts / 01/29/2012 at 2:36am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I was sitting on a bus. I'm deaf. An old lady looked very angry at me and started talking. Then she looked like she was screaming. I had to type on my phone that I'm deaf. Apparently, I'd been stepping on her foot. She decided to poke me in the eye and type, "Now you're blind too." FML

by Come on / 01/28/2012 at 7:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous