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jordi55

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jordi55

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3115
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jordi55's page activity

Visits<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 5:32pm<b>rjc490</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 11:11pm<b>NebulaNick</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 2:08pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 2:00pm<b>idiotgenius</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 8:57am<b>justcause001</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 7:24pm<b>SandyBella</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 5:16pm<b>AHSFan</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 2:45pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:17am<b>mia2054</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 1:43pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 12/06/2012 at 5:47pm<b>ysrhael</b> - the 12/04/2012 at 9:00pm<b>Chrisuh</b> - the 07/07/2012 at 7:10pm<b>youtubetre</b> - the 05/23/2012 at 11:46am<b>hereinnc</b> - the 05/07/2012 at 3:39pm<b>inlove72</b> - the 05/05/2012 at 11:44am<b>Sebastian_NG</b> - the 04/02/2012 at 7:46pm<b>caranina</b> - the 01/16/2012 at 4:21pm

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Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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jordi55's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. I'm nervous around them so he encouraged me to drink so I'd loosen up. I got so drunk I tore up all the things in his old room I thought were from ex-girlfriends and accidentally flashed his dad my crotch. FML

#20504494
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8765) - you deserved it (50407)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I had my girlfriend over for dinner with my family. My father had dressed up as a girl for a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and my girlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. FML

#20503190
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27815) - you deserved it (3205)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:55am - love - by BadLuckCarson - United States (Iowa)

Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML

#20503125
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39786) - you deserved it (8024)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by thefriedman (man) - United States (California)

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML

#20502217
173 comments

Today, I bought a fish. I put the tank on top of the fridge so my cat wouldn't get at it. I'd forgotten to buy some things for its tank, so I quickly ran out to get them. When I got home, I saw the tank destroyed on the floor, and my cat devouring my fish. I had the fish for less than an hour. FML

#20497647
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16424) - you deserved it (25903)

On 02/07/2013 at 10:58pm - animals - by fish killer - Canada

Today, I told my sister that boys are stronger than girls. She responded by beating the living crap out of me to prove me wrong. She's twelve. I'm eighteen. FML

#20496678
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11434) - you deserved it (55890)

On 02/07/2013 at 1:57am - misc - by manhandled by a little girl (man) - United States (California)

Today, as a firefighter, we were called to assist the ambulance crew with lifting a deceased patient out of a house. Little did I know, he had been dead inside for 3 weeks, and was bloated and popped like a water balloon when we attempted to move him. My girlfriend made soup for the evening meal. FML

#20488428
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38467) - you deserved it (2165)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm - work - by Fireguy92 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

#20486562
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47798) - you deserved it (3571) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version

Today, I learned it's a bad idea to text and smoke while drunk, because there is an increased risk of throwing your phone off the balcony and sticking your cigarette into your pocket. FML

#20485916
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11865) - you deserved it (54743)

On 01/30/2013 at 5:13am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after much self-doubt and awkwardness, I learned that I look amazing in a little black dress. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to tell my wife. FML

Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML

#20482822
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30172) - you deserved it (3706)

On 01/28/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by hopelessteej (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML

#20482645
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26056) - you deserved it (3208)

On 01/28/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by Creeped out (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29696) - you deserved it (3245)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband and I found the perfect house, in our price range and everything we wanted in a house. However, the street it's on is called "Arbour Butte Road". My husband refuses to buy it because he doesn't want it to sound like he lives "in a tree's ass." I'm married to an idiot. FML

#20451265
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29461) - you deserved it (5717)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by it's just a name (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, it's been 13 months since I've been living in the States. I've been called a Nazi, asked if we have electricity in Germany, and been made fun of the way I speak with my "German accent", the list goes on. I'm not even German, I'm Danish. FML

#20201491
410 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39774) - you deserved it (2442)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:45am - kids - by LearnGeographyUSA (man) - United States (Washington)



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