jordi55

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jordi55

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 August 1955 (60 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6206
  • Number of comments : 90
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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jordi55's page activity

Visits<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 12:27pm<b>pheizer01</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 11:31am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 2:49am<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 2:05am<b>bigbrown24</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 12:25am<b>Ruskiy_Cherep</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 9:32pm<b>melons</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 8:29pm<b>angelnursery</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 10:13am<b>ThrottleJockey</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 9:34am<b>Codezlol</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 6:51am<b>Toonice45</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 11:16am<b>jslaton91</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 12:56pm<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 6:23pm<b>nicolai44</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 6:44am<b>warmonger711</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 5:09pm<b>jewgeta</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 1:23am<b>Icefire9461</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 10:52pm<b>pagefault2k</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 8:30pm

Fucked!<b>Toonice45</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 12:26am<b>Fandomtaco</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 6:55pm<b>texasmade817</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 4:47am<b>KatieKoala</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 9:50am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 3:58pm<b>Purexinsanity</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 7:10pm

jordi55's FML badges

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

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jordi55's favorite FMLs

Today, while doing the grocery shopping with my boyfriend we came across another woman also out shopping, who looked shockingly like me despite her being another race, hair color and the like. The second he saw her, he blurted out, ''Oh, it's a pretty version of you!'' FML

by FuglyBetty / 02/24/2016 at 5:48pm / Norway (Aust-Agder) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home early to surprise my boyfriend. I walked into our bedroom to find him in dressed completely in my clothes, and in makeup. It took me a moment to realize it was him and not a female intruder. FML

by ConfusedGirl / 12/15/2015 at 8:03am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my roommates "pet" snake casually lying in bed with me. I then got yelled at for screaming and scaring the snake. Apparently, it's my fault that it bit my chin. FML

by earthlyscum / 05/18/2015 at 10:27pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my fiancée called off our wedding at the last moment, because her neurotic sister thinks she's "too fat" to be the maid of honor, and says she needs several months to lose weight. So that's a few thousand dollars wasted. My fiancée says I'm "overreacting" and that I "just don't get it". FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2015 at 3:17pm / United States (Vermont) / Love

Today, my mom called my workplace and told my boss to make sure I wear a hat so I didn't get heatstroke like I did on my last shift. I'm 25. FML

by notmysistersbf / 04/19/2015 at 10:39pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my boyfriend when he started squeezing me as if I were a ketchup bottle. He said he wanted my period to end quicker, and he honestly thought that would work. FML

by Keladrylady / 04/17/2015 at 8:47pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

by SDCore / 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my friend to download Frozen for me, because my mom wanted to play it for family movie night. The movie was shit, but it got even worse halfway through, when it cut to hardcore porn and a text bar saying "umad?" Now I'm grounded, and my "friend" is a legend for his prank. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2015 at 4:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a one night stand. After holding in my farts all night as is done, I decided enough was enough and to calmly let one slip out. One did not calmly slip out instead I shit myself in her bed. I was naked at the time so was unable to hide it. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2015 at 4:17pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML

by chelse_elyce / 01/20/2015 at 11:10pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I dragged my grill outside in the freezing cold to cook a steak for New Year's day. I left my spatula in the garage, and I set the still-wrapped steak on the grill. I was only gone 45 seconds, but that was long enough for my cat to open the wrapper and run off with my steak in his jaws. FML

by TaddM21 / 01/01/2015 at 10:18pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals

Today, I went on a road trip with my boyfriend and his best friend. What I thought was going to be a great, fun time ended up with me alone in a car with two large men who wouldn't stop farting for 14 hours. FML

by sandwhiched / 01/01/2015 at 3:52am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife told me she had a surprise for me when I came home. Surprise to me means sex, not a new puppy. FML

by dwood08 / 11/06/2014 at 8:55pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, my boss asked about the mass of deep scratches on my arm. I lied and told him it happened while I was trying to save my cat from a tree. Truth is, my cat is a sadistic asshole who stalks me and mauls me whenever he can. FML

by thewrittenrebel / 10/28/2014 at 3:40am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Animals

Today, as I was driving back home from my grandma's, I looked over at the guy in the lane beside me, only to witness him with a sandwich between his teeth and his cock in his free hand. Now I know why I don't leave the city, or even drive, more often. FML

by NNTA / 12/26/2013 at 6:21pm / Netherlands (Limburg) / Intimacy