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jordanb19

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jordanb19

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 572
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 18 posted

About jordanb19 : ...

jordanb19's page activity

Visits<b>nightfire2258</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 1:33pm<b>subhaan786</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 2:37pm<b>carecow</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 10:32pm<b>redwill85</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 7:59am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 4:59pm<b>flufee2</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 4:46pm<b>leeebeeeee18</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 2:06pm

jordanb19's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of jordanb19's badges

jordanb19's favorite FMLs

Today, I was trying to make a good impression with my fiancé's friends. After a few hours, I thought all was going well. As I walked to the washroom, I heard, "So what disability does she have? No one can be like that without something wrong in their brain." FML

#21395050
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26091) - you deserved it (2242)

On 04/17/2015 at 2:24am - love - by apparently_disabled - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got grounded because my mom found a condom in the bathroom trashcan and assumed it was mine. I took the blame because I was too embarrassed to admit that it must have belonged to my 13-year-old brother, since I'm still a virgin at 19. FML

#21391452
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29455) - you deserved it (4623)

On 04/10/2015 at 7:16pm - misc - by uglybrother (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my roommate's noisiest cat passed away. My previously-silent cat has decided that someone has to fill the void, and has been running around the apartment howling ever since. FML

#21391230
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26601) - you deserved it (3062)

On 04/10/2015 at 11:20am - animals - by Crazy cat lady - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I went to the gun range for a birthday and got shot in the foot by my mom. FML

#21390121
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29449) - you deserved it (3709)

On 04/08/2015 at 5:17pm - misc - by Notre_Dame_714 - United States

Today, I found out just how much my dog likes ice-cream when she tackled a little girl at a park for hers. FML

Today, I visited my sick grandpa for a few hours in the hospital. His roommate, also an elderly man, wouldn't stop masturbating. FML

#21388711
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29504) - you deserved it (1855)

On 04/06/2015 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by therewasnocurtain - United States (Idaho)

Today, I found my first bra and tried it on. It still fits. FML

#21388113
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30973) - you deserved it (3272)

On 04/05/2015 at 3:18pm - misc - by Itsbeen8years (woman) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, I am seven months pregnant with my third child. I woke up to my two-and-a-half year old trying to "pop the balloon" in my tummy. FML

#21384638
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26398) - you deserved it (2876)

On 03/31/2015 at 8:56am - kids - by mokki - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my older brother puked in the sound hole of my sister's guitar. He blamed it on me, and in revenge my sister beat me with the guitar. FML

#21383103
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27118) - you deserved it (1821)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:30pm - misc - by Pukey - United States

Today, I heard what sounded like water against my window, and I couldn't believe it was raining in Southern California at this time of the year. I then turned to the window to see a hobo peeing on my window. FML

#21380308
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29989) - you deserved it (2208)

On 03/23/2015 at 7:19pm - misc - by jumanji (man) -

Today, my younger sister stopped talking to me. I got engaged to my boyfriend of 4 years and apparently, she's been in love with him since she met him. Through me. She's 12. FML

#21380050
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34470) - you deserved it (2496)

On 03/23/2015 at 10:24am - love - by twelvie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I took the biggest, most excruciatingly painful crap of my life. It was so bad that I couldn't walk straight for a good 20 minutes afterwards. Long enough for my boyfriend to film me limping around and post the clip to Facebook with the caption "#anal ftw ;)". FML

#21379420
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29890) - you deserved it (3536)

On 03/22/2015 at 10:59am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was playing charades with my boyfriend and family. The answer was "Beckoning" so I acted it out with a "come here" gesture. He looked confused for a second, then blurted out "Fingering?" FML

#21378887
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28607) - you deserved it (3408)

On 03/21/2015 at 11:12am - misc - by ajodasdojsad (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML

#21378617
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29834) - you deserved it (38)

On 03/20/2015 at 9:32pm - love - by tumbleshay - United States (Oregon)



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