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johnmleech

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johnmleech

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  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1166
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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johnmleech's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my son and his friend comparing their penis sizes. They're 6. FML

#20415295
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36001) - you deserved it (5082)

On 12/23/2012 at 1:02am - misc - by oh my son - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my son and his friend comparing their penis sizes. They're 6. FML

#20415295
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36001) - you deserved it (5082)

On 12/23/2012 at 1:02am - misc - by oh my son - Canada (Ontario)

Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML

#20414298
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48594) - you deserved it (6157)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm - intimacy - by orgasmicriding (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41679) - you deserved it (8166)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, I was listening to a local radio station, and they did a segment called "food porn." As they were sexually describing various types of food, I actually found myself getting turned on over a pizza. FML

#20411354
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32471) - you deserved it (9105)

On 12/21/2012 at 12:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

#20409541
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33098) - you deserved it (3930)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by jsmills92 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

#20199452
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22370) - you deserved it (2310)

On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States

Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time; he asked me to explain my interest in dating her. In a mix of me trying to say "I want to be with your daughter" and "I want to be in your daughter's life" I got confused and said, "I want to be in your daughter." FML

#20198676
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31536) - you deserved it (6239)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:21am - love - by Tonguetied0496 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I walked into my room, only to find my 15-year-old brother violating my old teddy bear. FML

#20126784
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21739) - you deserved it (1533)

On 10/21/2012 at 2:54pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my cat played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

#20126149
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18556) - you deserved it (5345)

On 10/21/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while driving with my puppy in the passenger seat, he jumped out of the window. FML

#20124915
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18956) - you deserved it (24213)

On 10/20/2012 at 3:16am - animals - by puppylove - United States

Today, I discovered how pathetically introverted I am when during a car ride with my family, I said, "I really like this song" and my parents gasped because they didn't realize I was in the back seat. And I'm their only child. FML

#20005160
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25019) - you deserved it (2065)

On 08/06/2012 at 1:41am - misc - by mississippi123 - United States (California)

Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML

#19983789
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26925) - you deserved it (2082)

On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

#19983117
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26039) - you deserved it (12373)

On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I gave up smoking. A few hours later, I caught myself daydreaming about brutally killing a guy that gave me a mean look at the bus. Maybe I should go back to smoking. FML

#19949441
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21021) - you deserved it (4907)

On 07/17/2012 at 9:54am - health - by Anonymous - Greece (Attiki)



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