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johnmleech

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johnmleech

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  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1089
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Visits<b>Caylee_G</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 3:30pm<b>BumbleChick</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 4:15pm<b>ErinMeepMeep</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 7:43pm<b>Birdbath123</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 5:00pm<b>sierraleeannee</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 7:40pm<b>SweetSwede</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 12:47am<b>starlight300</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 5:22pm<b>Cash352</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 11:32am<b>shaar</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 8:59am<b>peopleses1</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 1:52pm<b>JillianBall</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 8:54pm<b>iBeCareless</b> - the 01/26/2013 at 11:12am<b>Mallory_Mariie</b> - the 12/20/2012 at 8:08pm<b>Vanny69</b> - the 12/20/2012 at 2:35pm<b>sarajane18</b> - the 12/19/2012 at 8:54pm<b>d_barkley16</b> - the 12/19/2012 at 6:51am<b>pradip</b> - the 12/19/2012 at 1:33am<b>jujubunni5</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 8:40pm

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johnmleech's favorite FMLs

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he reached out onto my dressing table to grab the lube. He missed, and found the hand sanitizer instead. I'm not sure who is in more pain. FML

#20467584
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44062) - you deserved it (7019)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:20am - intimacy - by tingles (woman) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

#20466884
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30218) - you deserved it (2590)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

#20466086
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34411) - you deserved it (3622)

On 01/18/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by Keastwood013 - United States

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

#20462136
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35692) - you deserved it (3740)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by WTF (man) -

Today, my grandfather asked me why the broccoli I served for dinner was white. I told him it was cauliflower. He would't believe me, accused me of being a Russian spy, and stormed out. FML

#20461359
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30504) - you deserved it (2701)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by veggieluver (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after a long, horrible day at work and some fighting with my family and my girlfriend, I decided to cheer myself up by going to McDonald's for a change. I burst into tears when the cashier told me they couldn't make me a Mars McFlurry because they'd run out of ingredients. FML

#20460946
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33882) - you deserved it (7574)

On 01/15/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

#20460703
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41254) - you deserved it (5717)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

#20460703
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41254) - you deserved it (5717)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I felt like going to the gym. I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to come with me. She screamed at me for supposedly implying that she's fat. No, I just wanted to go to the gym with someone. FML

#20458971
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33559) - you deserved it (6452)

On 01/14/2013 at 1:34pm - love - by nkotz - United States

Today, while I was having sex, he stopped, looked at me all seriously and said, "Permission to climax, ma'am?" FML

#20458937
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35602) - you deserved it (6632)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, both my brother and sister missed my wedding. She was playing in a Call of Duty tournament, and he got so high that he forgot about the wedding completely. He was my best man. FML

#20458912
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41461) - you deserved it (2362)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:36pm - misc - by What a happy day (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27837) - you deserved it (3057)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, trying to be sweet, I told my girlfriend that I'm so happy we met one another. She muttered, "Well, that makes one of us." FML

#20453944
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27884) - you deserved it (2674)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:22pm - misc - by wtf did i do?? (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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