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johnmleech's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 2:56pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by iLynz / 04/23/2013 at 2:34am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/19/2013 at 9:16pm / New Zealand / Transportation
Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML
by thanks gramps / 04/19/2013 at 3:27am / Canada (Yukon Territory) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/17/2013 at 7:01pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Love
by lonely / 04/14/2013 at 11:45pm / United States / Love
by confusedcatlover / 04/06/2013 at 7:42am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
Today, while working the drive-through, a woman ordered a large coffee with four creams. I handed her the coffee, and she took a sip. She then hurled it at me, screaming, "I said four creams, not five!" and sped off, leaving me drenched in hot coffee. FML
by Anonymous / 04/05/2013 at 12:26pm / United States / Work
by madiison09 / 04/01/2013 at 1:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I spent three hours painstakingly installing and configuring some parental control software on my 11-year-old son's laptop after I caught him watching porn. Barely an hour after returning the laptop, I caught him watching yet more porn on it. FML
by Anonymous / 03/24/2013 at 6:30am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids
Today, I walked outside to this guy attempting to steal my bike. When I asked him what he was doing he calmly replied, "I'm a bike inspector. You hooked your chain all wrong! This time is a warning; next time it'll be a ticket!" He then threw his full, opened Pepsi can at me. FML
by Chelsea / 02/27/2013 at 5:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss told me to go outside and take part in the company's stupid Harlem Shake video. When I declined, he threatened to fire me if I didn't take part. I ended up being the guy who had to furiously pelvic thrust before the music dropped. FML
by mypelvishurts / 02/23/2013 at 2:32am / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 02/21/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous
by pornhastaughtmenothing / 02/21/2013 at 3:46am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML
by Laila / 02/20/2013 at 7:01am / United States / Kids
- Today, I was talking about Star Wars with some of my friends. When they started talking about how… Today, I just found out that my little brother likes to peak through the crack of the bathroom door… Today I received a phone call for a reservation (I'm a B&B owner) for 12 firefighters (he said they…