About jmfv2 : Im a laid back guy that would like to have friends or anyone to party with, and to get me out of my shell .
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36541) - you deserved it (1032)
On 01/13/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Drewbie (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, my girlfriend and I went to the cinema. Or rather, she went with her other boyfriend, and I happened to see them there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37774) - you deserved it (2105)
On 12/29/2012 at 10:50am - love - by awkward. (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I was driving without my seatbelt on, when I noticed a police car approaching. I panicked and desperately fumbled around for my seatbelt, only for them to pass by with just a funny look. Then it hit me that I was riding my motorcycle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19595) - you deserved it (32571) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44704) - you deserved it (7276)
On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)
Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27109) - you deserved it (14052)
On 12/19/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ayye_its_nikki - United States (Texas)
Today, a very attractive girl moved in across the road from me. As I was leaving, I noticed she was looking out her window at me. I tried playing it cool, only to end up tripping over my own feet, hands in pocket, and faceplanting the hood of my dad's car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21816) - you deserved it (14046)
On 04/22/2011 at 9:39pm - kids - by NathanPlays - United States (California)
Today, my dad woke me up for the second time to get me ready for school. Wanting me to prove I was really awake, he made me sit up. As soon as he left my room, I dozed off and faceplanted my nightstand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8776) - you deserved it (29919)
On 04/04/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by Username - United States (Kansas)
Today, my boyfriend offered to give me a piggyback ride from the house to the car as means of avoiding walking in mud. Both aware of how tall he is, he crouched extra low and I jumped extra hard. This makes for a terrible example of leapfrog, and a faceplant in the mud. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14055) - you deserved it (6283)
On 03/14/2010 at 10:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was babysitting three little kids. I decided to give one of them (a seven-year-old) a piggy-back ride, thinking I'm strong enough. I managed to get a few feet before faceplanting on the wooden floor. She is fine though, no pain or anything. My face took the impact for both of us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6658) - you deserved it (15680)
On 01/30/2010 at 12:05am - kids - by ouchy (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was in a tense tiebreak round to win the local pub quiz. As the quizmaster read out more clues, I got the answer, got up and rushed to be the first team to the bar. I tripped, faceplanted. The whole bar laughed, and then I realized that it wasn't a "fastest to the bar" round. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4759) - you deserved it (14177)
On 01/27/2010 at 3:24am - misc - by pubquizgenius (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was running with my sister's dog. It had the brilliant idea of shooting between my legs and I immediately faceplanted on the cement. I now have a swollen nose and cuts all over my body. I'm a grown man who does martial arts and I got beat up by a dog the size of a baby. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23034) - you deserved it (4624)
On 06/17/2009 at 10:12am - health - by Broken (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was rollerblading in the university gardens and taking pictures. A worker started to yell at me, and I told him that I had perfect control and could stay on the sidewalk. As I turned to skate away, I faceplanted into a bed of prized rare flowers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6278) - you deserved it (43114)
On 04/30/2009 at 2:11am - misc - by krizleykrislo - United States (Michigan)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
