About jlbasile : College student who has been stabbed in the back more times than Caesar yet continues to keep a smile on my face and a beer in the fridge.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I went to get a condom because my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. When I opened the drawer, I saw that every single condom had a Jesus pin stabbed through it, and a note on top of the box: "love mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (102567) - you deserved it (17438)
On 02/24/2009 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71396) - you deserved it (16794)
On 02/24/2009 at 6:32pm - intimacy - by Menareidiots (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was hooking up with a girl in my apartment when I told her I didn't have a condom. She started laughing and upon realizing my look of confusion, said "Oh, you actually thought I was going to have sex with you?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (47428) - you deserved it (13277)
On 02/16/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by pineapple456 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (222205) - you deserved it (37764)
On 02/06/2009 at 10:55pm - misc - by hahahehehohohoo (woman) - United States (California)
Today, a toddler's play ball rolled over to me in the park. I playfully pitched it to him as his parents watched from afar. The ball hit him in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15839) - you deserved it (2131)
On 01/29/2009 at 6:08pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New York)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and accidentally called her Brad (one of my roomates name) when I came. Now her and her friends think i'm gay and my roomate Brad moved out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31999) - you deserved it (25981)
On 01/29/2009 at 4:44pm - intimacy - by GavinHosler - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy the Plan B pill. The pharmacist recognized me and said, "Really? Again?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (6651) - you deserved it (26278)
On 01/29/2009 at 10:19am - misc - by Hahaha - United States (California)
Today, I hid my credit card from myself so I wouldn't use it. Now I can't find it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4941) - you deserved it (32281)
On 01/27/2009 at 11:47am - money - by dannij08 - United States (California)
Today, I finally broke my two year dry spell, but as she was putting on the condom, I came. She laughed from the time she was putting on her clothes to when she walked out the door. I don't think she's going to call back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33219) - you deserved it (6921)
On 01/27/2009 at 7:47am - intimacy - by theguy24 - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I tripped over my own shoelace after explaining to my boyfriend that my shoes being untied were good luck for me. He then took that as the grand opportunity to tell me that we were breaking up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14939) - you deserved it (4230)
On 01/26/2009 at 8:54pm - love - by CaptainSosuke - United States (California)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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