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jkmartinjk

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jkmartinjk
  • Town/Country : Eh, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1111
  • Number of comments : 344
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

About jkmartinjk : Stay cool everybody.

jkmartinjk's last visitors

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jkmartinjk's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting in the living room with my parents when my dad asked my mom if she knew where he could find some double a batteries. She said to check my vibrator. He said he already did. FML

Today, I went to have dessert with my boyfriend. We ordered some Jello. I said that I loved Jello because it is so fun and jiggly. My boyfriend said, "Like you. Except the fun part". FML

#137765
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40923) - you deserved it (4773)

On 02/25/2009 at 9:23pm - misc - by Jello (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the store to buy some condoms for my girlfriend, Kim and I. I was in a rush and when I looked at the cashier realized it was her father. Nervous and hoping to reassure him, I go "don't worry, I'm not using these with Kim." That didn't help. FML

#107795
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22997) - you deserved it (62284)

On 02/22/2009 at 8:38pm - intimacy - by madfather (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, they were handing out free razors in the mall. I went up to get my free sample, but the woman just smiled and said, "Sorry honey, they're sharp, and not for children." I'm 25. FML

#84898
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38843) - you deserved it (2176)

On 02/20/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by Noname - United States (New York)

Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like. I took off my shirt and my bra and he said "wow, that's disappointing." FML

#69472
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (100250) - you deserved it (9010)

On 02/18/2009 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by notsohappy (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my brother joked that our dog was more attractive than I was. I looked to my mom for support, and she said "Well, she is pure bred." FML

#63875
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30318) - you deserved it (2488)

On 02/17/2009 at 9:52pm - animals - by Noname (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to a fastfood restaurant to pick up food for my work party. I ordered 250 chicken fingers, 15 orders of fries, and 2 gallons of tea, and the guy behind the counter asked, "Is this for here or to go?" FML

Today, I had to give a speech on stage at a local preschool about fire safety. I'm 32 years old and passed out on stage because I felt extremely nervous and intimitated by a group of 4 year olds. FML

#35636
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34027) - you deserved it (7088)

On 02/13/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by buster (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boss asked me to pick up an extra shift. I said I couldn't because I have a date. He told me I didn't need to lie and to just say no next time. FML

#20879
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31930) - you deserved it (2056)

On 02/10/2009 at 2:35pm - misc - by Flavorite (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my tennis coach showed up to practice in an all white outfit. I exclaimed, "You're looking very white today!" He's African American. FML

#19641
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8422) - you deserved it (37074)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:59am - misc - by Tennisplayer (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that I know more about Paris Hilton's cervix than how my government is run. FML

#6894
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4810) - you deserved it (26690)

On 02/03/2009 at 7:11pm - misc - by parishiltonsbff (man) - United States (California)

Today, I sent a guy that I like a lot a picture of myself, I got all dressed up sexy and did my make-up. He sent me a reply saying "your cat is fat". FML

#5809
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18857) - you deserved it (4453)

On 02/02/2009 at 9:36pm - love - by Noname - United States (California)

Today, I danced with a girl until the bar closed. We went back to my place. She had a penis. FML

#2248
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41587) - you deserved it (7812)

On 01/22/2009 at 6:27pm - love - by Noname - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was doing a local search at SexSearch.com and I found my sister's profile. FML

#727
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33235) - you deserved it (8487)

On 01/07/2009 at 10:22am - intimacy - by shocked1 - Canada (Ontario)



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