Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jillz

Search for a member

jillz

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 54276
  • Number of comments : 333
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jillz : Hey! YOU there. That's right. I see you. *grins* Has anyone told you how much you ROCK lately? No? Hm......

jillz's page activity

Visits<b>abbyj2201</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 2:22am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 4:36pm<b>Whorunstheworld</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 10:33pm<b>bshefler</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 4:27pm<b>astrogirl</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 5:23pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 10:22pm<b>music8484</b> - the 11/23/2013 at 7:07pm<b>i_wuz_nver_here</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 2:19am<b>TGheat1</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 6:59pm<b>suellan202</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 11:53pm<b>Sexy_Cat_MD</b> - the 06/01/2012 at 12:49pm<b>edoohan619</b> - the 12/29/2011 at 6:09pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:26pm<b>angrynegro7</b> - the 02/10/2010 at 7:08pm<b>perdix</b> - the 02/05/2010 at 3:40pm<b>CrunchyInMilk</b> - the 12/16/2009 at 4:47pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/24/2009 at 11:38pm<b>becalm</b> - the 11/24/2009 at 4:26pm

jillz's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jillz's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

#2418263
449 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20834) - you deserved it (218736)

On 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was in Walmart. I saw a demo for Guitar Hero on the DS so I started playing. I was kicking ass and really feeling great about myself. I then looked away for a second, looked back down, and saw that the notes were still being hit. The demo had been on automatic-player the entire time. FML

#2414317
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17124) - you deserved it (59700)

On 05/29/2009 at 9:10pm - misc - by theskippster - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend of two years asked me to marry him so that we can consolidate our student loans. FML

#2376040
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50694) - you deserved it (3462)

On 05/28/2009 at 3:51pm - love - by loserface23 (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend of two years asked me to marry him so that we can consolidate our student loans. FML

#2376040
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50694) - you deserved it (3462)

On 05/28/2009 at 3:51pm - love - by loserface23 (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I decided to give blood for the second time. I felt excrutiating pain when she stuck the needle in my arm. Another nurse came running over in a panic. Apparently my inexperienced nurse had put it in my tendon instead of my vein. FML

#2363233
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62994) - you deserved it (2470)

On 05/28/2009 at 12:19am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend who lives in China contacted me and told me she'd been harassed by a guy and was thinking about pressing charges. The guy is someone I know from college - he promised me he would say "hi" to her for me while he was in Shanghai. FML

#2339786
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50786) - you deserved it (4694)

On 05/27/2009 at 12:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I took my friends out to an expensive restaurant for my birthday treat. They had arranged for a surprise birthday cake for me which I cut, very happily, while they chanted birthday wishes. When the bill came, I discovered I was supposed to pay for my great 'surprise' cake. FML

#2336185
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49075) - you deserved it (4816)

On 05/27/2009 at 6:15am - money - by abc (woman) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, my most difficult task at work was three hole punching a 500 page document so somebody could put it in a binder on their shelf and not read it. I have a $150,000 education. FML

#2326583
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45724) - you deserved it (7134)

On 05/26/2009 at 10:19pm - work - by bagpipesrkmywrld (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at a mall. A woman stopped by me, said slowly and loudly, in Spanish "baño?" Knowing a bit of Spanish, I nodded and pointed the restrooms out for her. She then mutters about "dang Mexicans and their inability to speak English". I'm not even Latina. I'm Irish-American. FML

#2308873
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62952) - you deserved it (3649)

On 05/26/2009 at 1:45pm - misc - by Anon (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother". FML

#2271321
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78420) - you deserved it (4829)

On 05/25/2009 at 10:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom was driving me somewhere. As we were driving she got mad at a motorcycle driver telling to "get the fuck off the road." In response, the driver decided to spit into my open window. His spit landed on my face. FML

#2267007
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48741) - you deserved it (3708)

On 05/25/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by hahahah111 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mother came up to me a swim meet and shouted to me in the bleachers "If you have to go potty, go now because there is a long line!". I'm seventeen. FML

#2262925
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46941) - you deserved it (2756)

On 05/25/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by embarassed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML

#2244608
452 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40394) - you deserved it (139825)

On 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by helloitsbrian6969 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was watching tv on the couch. My mom then kicked me off so she could lie down. Exhausted, I asked if I could sit at the end. She said no. A minute later she called the dog to come sit with her. As I was sitting on the ground, my mom told me to move because "the dog can't see the TV." FML

#2241699
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73508) - you deserved it (4107)

On 05/24/2009 at 2:05pm - animals - by holly (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I pulled up to a stoplight and blew past the car beside me to merge into one lane. About 30 seconds later, I ran out of gas right in front of them. We were on a bridge, and I had to push my car all the way across. FML

#2225045
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8283) - you deserved it (54628)

On 05/23/2009 at 10:17pm - misc - by DQB (man) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: