Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

jesusjr

Search for a member

jesusjr

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 42198
  • Number of comments : 80
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About jesusjr : I will try to point out the bright side of life

jesusjr's page activity

Visits<b>Cynical_D_Luffy</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 12:38pm<b>Soger7</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 9:30am<b>ThatsStoryOfLife</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:49pm<b>abattior</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 1:52am<b>SmokinGuns</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 2:00am<b>Beanu</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 9:34am<b>danii_dillon</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 1:52pm<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 11:48pm<b>MickiJ</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 6:24pm<b>TylerScatdaddy</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 12:57pm<b>Munchlax11</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 9:13am<b>PenguinBitch</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 2:47pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 11:55pm<b>LunaaBluee</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 5:30pm<b>megan_j01</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 8:33pm<b>austinssquidgy</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 11:56am<b>derk890</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 3:08pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 01/09/2012 at 11:49am

jesusjr's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

jesusjr's favorite FMLs

Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML

#2812014
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (94856) - you deserved it (20018)

On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

#2459150
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22991) - you deserved it (75860)

On 05/31/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by deucelututi - United States (New York)

Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop: 763. I'm 24. FML

#2209832
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49814) - you deserved it (21456)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by Tootsy_Roll_Pop (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

#2182938
381 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83535) - you deserved it (10231)

On 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm - intimacy - by herve (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, me and my boyfriend came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good my phone rings. It was a text from my mom, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML

#415809
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101251) - you deserved it (45793)

On 03/17/2009 at 4:40pm - intimacy - by MrAwsum (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was filling out paperwork with my new doctor. During the questionnaire, she asked if I was sexually active. I said yes. She then asked, "What do you do?" I told her I normally did vaginal, but sometimes anal. She blushed and started to laugh. She was asking where I worked. FML

Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML

#9520
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34232) - you deserved it (59779)

On 02/05/2009 at 9:09am - intimacy - by ruffrider (woman) - United States (South Carolina)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: