jessxoxo28

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jessxoxo28

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 April 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 99772
  • Number of comments : 1162
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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jessxoxo28's page activity

Visits<b>Chibster</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 6:52pm<b>grajax</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 1:02am<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 1:48pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 8:11pm<b>3051628</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 3:40am<b>kylo_117</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 12:28pm<b>lexred</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 10:51am<b>pmore04</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 7:29pm<b>HAMY</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 11:34am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 3:38am<b>C7</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 4:22am<b>Sam963</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 5:30am<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 2:41am<b>immaloser95</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 10:28pm<b>kingshelly</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 2:56am<b>freyday</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 9:14pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 12:10am<b>Chewstick1227</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 9:30am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 2:11am<b>kingshelly</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 8:56am<b>max367</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 12:41am

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jessxoxo28's favorite FMLs

Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML

by ohmy / 12/17/2009 at 2:09pm / Canada / Animals

Today, I was hit on by a guy who decided to use the line, "My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in." FML

by luckygirl / 12/14/2009 at 4:05am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my grandpa was wearing flip flops and white socks. He entered my restroom, and the moment he did it, I realized there was no toilet paper left. I felt too ashamed to interrupt his dump, so I waited for him to ask for paper, he never did and came out without socks. FML

by dayum / 12/10/2009 at 4:03pm / Mexico (Chihuahua) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up with a ridiculous hangover and no memory of last night. I called my friend who told me that I was so trashed I ended up eating all the hamburgers and chicken fingers in her fridge. I've been a vegetarian for 15 years. FML

by squishy / 11/18/2009 at 4:11pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML

by TheMichaelNixon / 11/14/2009 at 4:37pm / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML

by TheMichaelNixon / 11/14/2009 at 4:37pm / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

Today, I returned home for the first time in a year, and found my entire computer missing. I asked my grandma about this, and she told me that she threw "the TV" away because it "no longer responded to the remote control." FML

by missmycomp / 11/12/2009 at 9:36am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML

by dinosaurman / 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend's head was on my lap. I bent down to kiss him. My stomach rolls got there first. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2009 at 5:40pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 45 minutes. I am an elevator mechanic. FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2009 at 2:02am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, was my grandmother's funeral and we had to sing. My dad is a horrible singer, and I tried my hardest not to laugh, I turned red faced and tears were falling from my eyes. My step mother held my hand and said that she was in a better place. I couldn't hold it any longer. I laughed my ass off. FML

by shewholaughsatthedead / 07/29/2009 at 9:44pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML

by locksmack / 06/14/2009 at 8:46am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came up to me telling me he wanted to eat my face. Confused, I asked him why. He said, "Because your face looks like pizza." FML

by PiZzA_FaCe / 05/29/2009 at 5:09pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I was preparing a dinner for some business associates, in hopes of closing the deal on a promotion. I emailed them with the menu, in case there were any allergies. Hours later, I checked the email again to find that instead of serving the Roast Duck I would be serving the Roast Fuck. FML

by wordmalfunction / 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was preparing a dinner for some business associates, in hopes of closing the deal on a promotion. I emailed them with the menu, in case there were any allergies. Hours later, I checked the email again to find that instead of serving the Roast Duck I would be serving the Roast Fuck. FML

by wordmalfunction / 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous