jessicaazzzzzzzz

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jessicaazzzzzzzz

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 20 April 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1154
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jessicaazzzzzzzz's page activity

Visits<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 11:43am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 9:45pm<b>idiotgenius</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 8:42pm<b>Usuario</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 10:46pm<b>Mons</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 1:03am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 7:27am<b>1s4t0p3</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 11:24pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 5:26pm<b>steal_this</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 6:03pm<b>Spartancjm</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 10:14pm<b>Mordeci</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 11:06pm<b>Fireashes250</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 12:05am<b>roundnproud</b> - the 05/11/2012 at 2:34pm<b>kingghidorah</b> - the 05/09/2012 at 1:51pm<b>trueblue170</b> - the 05/08/2012 at 7:45am

Fucked!<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 3:45am

jessicaazzzzzzzz's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

jessicaazzzzzzzz's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a restaurant in front of a lot of people. Once I said yes, some guy yelled out, "SEX. SEX. SEX." My boyfriend yelled back, "LATER!" FML

by BooBabe / 06/04/2012 at 7:50pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I had so much to do, I didn't know where to start. So I didn't. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2012 at 10:29am / Austria (Wien) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly, she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing, she said, "Oh, am I driving?" FML

by anonymus / 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML

by Jacquelinez / 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up after a long night of drinking with my friends. I vaguely remembered visiting a tattoo parlour, but nothing prepared me for the sight of the words "YOLO" and "MOFO" tattooed across the fingers of my left and right hands. Now I'm officially a bandwagoning douchebag. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2012 at 5:56pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

by smart move there / 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm / Ireland (Kildare) / Intimacy

Today, I'm on a trip to Poland with some friends. We came to experience the country's culture, and to challenge our preconceptions about this part of Europe. We had sat on a bench, and not ten seconds later, a stranger approached and asked, "How much for your friend?" FML

by LearnToLive / 05/15/2012 at 11:59am / Holidays

Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML

by Anonymous / 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Kids

Today, I was at a restaurant with my kids. I told my 13 year old about how the very first time she said she loved me. She was 2 and it was at this very restaurant. I told her the details and even started tearing up a little. She didn't even look up from her cell phone and said, "That's fab, ma." FML

by Anonymous / 05/10/2012 at 4:33pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well, the sex wouldn't be any different." FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 7:35am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm / United States / Money

Today, I'm cheering myself up about being newly single by having a sleepover with my best friends. Their boyfriends have all decided to sleep over as well though, so I'm currently alone in a corridor with nothing but the sound of all my friends having loud sex to keep me company. FML

by coffeeshopgirl / 05/07/2012 at 8:25pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I got some spam stating that I'd have no love life in the coming 10 years if I didn't reply to it. So, no different to the last 10 years then. FML

by monkeywrench / 05/01/2012 at 1:14am / United States / Love

Today, I was visiting my 8-year-old nephew. He told me he learned about fire safety, so I asked him what he'd do if there were a fire right now. He pushed me out of the way and I fell, then he ran over me and out the front door, leaving me on the floor in pain. FML

by Anonymous / 04/30/2012 at 8:22pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, driving home, I got bored and started debating how I know this is reality and not just a dream, even though dreams often seem real. The answer came quickly; in my dreams, I work normal hours and have time for things like hanging out with friends, and having a girlfriend. FML

by metalwolf / 04/20/2012 at 4:56am / United States / Miscellaneous