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jessicaazzzzzzzz

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jessicaazzzzzzzz

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 20 April 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 811
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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jessicaazzzzzzzz's page activity

Visits<b>Usuario</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 10:46pm<b>Aleem</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 2:36pm<b>Mons</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 1:03am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 7:27am<b>1s4t0p3</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 11:24pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 5:26pm<b>steal_this</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 6:03pm<b>Spartancjm</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 10:14pm<b>Mordeci</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 11:06pm<b>Fireashes250</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 12:05am<b>roundnproud</b> - the 05/11/2012 at 2:34pm<b>kingghidorah</b> - the 05/09/2012 at 1:51pm<b>trueblue170</b> - the 05/08/2012 at 7:45am

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50 favourites

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It’s in the can

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jessicaazzzzzzzz's favorite FMLs

Today, I arrived home after a hard day's work to see my 12-year-old sister had greased up my 8-year-old brother with butter and olive oil, and was attempting to slide him down the wooden floorboards in the hallway. FML

#20161557
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20289) - you deserved it (2012)

On 11/13/2012 at 5:00am - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I saw a man lying face down in a field and thinking he was injured, I ran over to help. As soon as I got to him, I realized he was completely naked. He stood up and chased after me. FML

#20131002
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24652) - you deserved it (2186)

On 10/24/2012 at 7:14am - misc - by bill - United States (Maryland)

Today, as I entered a stairwell, the fire alarm went off, triggering the automatic fire doors to close. The one I was walking through ran over my foot, ripping my toenail, and then smacked me in the face. FML

#20113123
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20155) - you deserved it (1645)

On 10/12/2012 at 1:58am - misc - by minustoenail - United States (California)

Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML

#20097870
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26946) - you deserved it (3441)

On 10/02/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my 5-year-old, overweight Siberian Husky tackled me because he thought that my lipstick was food. FML

#20091999
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17350) - you deserved it (5648)

On 09/28/2012 at 6:53am - animals - by emilyhendrix0414 - United States

Today, I was talking on the phone with my crush. After an hour of talking she told me, "If you were half as hot as you sound over the phone, I'd date you immediately." Maybe I should give up on love and start a phone sex line. FML

#20078825
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30432) - you deserved it (2255)

On 09/19/2012 at 2:24am - intimacy - by annonymous - United States

Today, after a visit with my mom, I started feeling sick. I meant to send her a text asking if she had gotten sick lately, but I accidentally sent a text asking if she had gotten dick lately. FML

#20054615
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27741) - you deserved it (4618)

On 09/02/2012 at 7:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to force myself to take a dump at school, even though I have severe restroom anxiety and shyness. I had finally relaxed enough to go when the tornado drills went off mid-dump, and 46 students and teachers packed into the bathroom with me. FML

#20048959
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33014) - you deserved it (2232)

On 08/30/2012 at 1:55am - misc - by DamnTornadoAlley - United States (Texas)

Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML

#20025968
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24510) - you deserved it (2677)

On 08/17/2012 at 3:45am - misc - by Sarah - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

#20012782
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29780) - you deserved it (16405)

On 08/10/2012 at 1:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I went to visit a friend I hadn't seen in ages who lives alone out in the country. I arrived and found the front door unlocked but no one was home. I went in anyway and helped myself to some food. Then a family I had never seen before came in, and I realized it wasn't my friend's house. FML

#20007202
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9409) - you deserved it (29528)

On 08/07/2012 at 3:48am - misc - by Embarrassed - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was at a gas station when the cash register made a sound effect similar to one from Sonic the Hedgehog, and I pointed this out. The cashier then saw fit to go on a rant about how I need to stop focusing on video games, and get a life and a girlfriend. FML

#20006832
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19270) - you deserved it (6251)

On 08/07/2012 at 12:16am - misc - by Marcowalker95 - United States (California)

Today, I was at a gas station when the cash register made a sound effect similar to one from Sonic the Hedgehog, and I pointed this out. The cashier then saw fit to go on a rant about how I need to stop focusing on video games, and get a life and a girlfriend. FML

#20006832
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19270) - you deserved it (6251)

On 08/07/2012 at 12:16am - misc - by Marcowalker95 - United States (California)



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